Richard Quote #110
Lorelai: [on the phone] Are you telling me that you were sitting right next to this woman while she called me?
Richard: She is my secretary, Lorelai.
Lorelai: You were sitting right there?
Richard: This is the way a proper business is conducted.
Lorelai: Two feet from the phone?
Richard: I'm not going to argue with you.
Quote from Lorelai
Luke: You ate the cookie, and then you took a cookie out of the box and put it where the cookie you just ate was.
Luke: Well, that's nuts.
Lorelai: Rory made this for me, I don't wanna ruin it.
Luke: Then why'd you eat the cookie?
Lorelai: 'Cause I wanted a Mallomar.
Luke: But why didn't you just eat one out of the box?
Lorelai: 'Cause this one was right here. The box was all the way in the cupboard.
Luke: But you had to go to the cupboard to get the box to replace the cookie you ate off the table.
Quote from Michel
Tobin: Michel, did you get a bagel?
Michel: I don't want a bagel.
Tobin: Are you sure? They're Kosher.
Michel: I don't eat bagels. Bagels are like glue in your intestines and ensure that everything that enters your body will remain there until you die.
Sookie: Ew. Shut up.
Quote from You've Been Gilmored
Richard: Better not wait. Small gaps in your insurance coverage can lead to big mistakes. Oh, I could tell you horror stories.
Emily: Brian Hunter.
Richard: Yes. He owned a home for 40 years - huge mansion - never updated his coverage. One night, his trophy bimbo wife got into a drunken snit, lit a curtain on fire with her marijuana cigarette, and burned the place to the ground. He couldn't afford to rebuild. Lost his fortune, lost the bimbo.
Emily: Now he sells sunglasses out of the back of a van in California. Cheap ones.
Richard: Because he didn't update his coverage.
Quote from The Great Stink
Richard: Well, naturally I thought they were referring to the archduke. So I jumped in, as who wouldn't? With some thoughts about the various conspiracy theories surrounding his infamous assassination in Sarajevo. Imagine my surprise when I learned that Franz Ferdinand was the name of a very popular rock-'n'-roll band.
Emily: [laughs] That's what he gets for trying to fraternize after class with his students.
Richard: One of them even offered to burn a CD for me.