Lorelai: How about a triple feature? Three Days of the Condor, The Show, and The Jerk.
Rory: Hmm. The Show is, like, 9.5 hours.
Lorelai: But The Jerk is short.
Rory: Hmm.
Lorelai: The three faces of Costner: Bull Durham, Dances with Wolves, The Postman. Tom Petty playing Tom Petty, that great big speech about: "Once upon a time, there was a thing called mail. It'll make you laugh, cry, or mail something."
Rory: Ooh, we could do a Ruth Gordon film festival. Harold and Maude, Rosemary's Baby, and that really great episode of Taxi.
Lorelai: Got it. The worst film festival ever: Cool as Ice, Hudson Hawk, and Electric Boogaloo.
Rory: Sold.
Lorelai: I'll get the Hawk.
Rory: I'll get the Boogaloo.

Richard: You didn't order any grapefruit.
Lorelai: Yeah, I don't really like grapefruit.
Richard: Hmm. I always start my breakfast with half a grapefruit.
Lorelai: Do the Florida people know about you? Because Anita Bryant left this huge gap that has yet to be filled.
Richard: It's important to start the day off correctly, Lorelai. A grapefruit is brain food. It has vitamin C and folic acid, and it helps with your digestion. It really is a terrific fruit.
Lorelai: I feel like you're about to break into song.
Richard: I'm serious about this, Lorelai.
Lorelai: I know you are, but I still don't like grapefruit.
Richard: Well, there are many things in life that we don't like but their benefits far outweigh the temporary discomforts we have to endure.

Richard: Don't you think I know why you "invited" me here?
Lorelai: Because-
Richard: Because your mother asked you to. She called you up and said I was driving her crazy. And would you please take me off her hands for one day so she could get some peace, isn't that true?
Lorelai: No.
Richard: You have never once invited me to your house, Lorelai. Never. And I can hardly point to an event that would prompt you to do so except my recent employment situation.
Lorelai: Okay, Dad, Mom did call me, but-
Richard: You know, I never thought about retirement. I never thought about what I would do or what I would be once I wasn't working. I never once imagined that I would go from being a productive member of the human race to a decrepit old drone sitting at the club at 3:00 in the afternoon drinking brandy and playing cards.
Lorelai: Oh, Dad.
Richard: I am an annoyance to my wife and a burden to my daughter. Suddenly I realize what it feels like to be obsolete. I hope that you never have to learn what that feels like. Now, if you'll excuse me. I'm afraid I'll have to take a rain check on dinner. I'm not very hungry.