Kirk: Luke, check it out. I've been published.
Luke: You have?
Kirk: Mother wanted to sell her dinette set, so I put pen to paper, got my creative juices flowing, and voila.
Luke: You put a want ad in the Stars Hollow Gazette?
Kirk: It's a powerful feeling seeing yourself immortalized in print. Sure, it's only newsprint. It rips easily, it comes off on your fingers, and the next day, people use it to wrap fish, but, hey, it's how Dickens got started.
Luke: In want ads?
Kirk: Man, this thing really flows. "Vintage dinette set, formica, barely chipped, priced to move." It's precise, efficient, Hemingwayesque in its terse simplicity. Hey, with two buns in the oven, you wouldn't be interested in a dinette set, would you? Seats four.
Zach: No, thanks, man.

Sookie: Ooh, Angelina and Brad had their baby. [gasps] Months and months ago.
Lorelai: Yeah, you're a little behind the times.
Sookie: This is the problem with having two kids under the age of 4. World events just pass you by.
Lorelai: Are you done with those favors?
Sookie: You know, I cannot believe Britney is driving with her baby on her lap like that. What is she doing with that guy, by the way?
Lorelai: Well, you'll be glad to know they've since broken up, although it turns out he was kind of a stabilizing influence in her life. Who knew?
Sookie: You're kidding.
Lorelai: Mmm-hmm.

Lane: You didn't hear about the fight? Me and my mom, classic Kim family grudgefest? If not for your mom, we might have gone the way of pretty girls make graves. They were so young and had so many killer albums left in them.
Rory: So my mom brokered peace?
Lane: Hard-core. Listen, here's the thing. My kids are gonna need that, too. You know, when they're hiding bibles and they can't stand me. So what I wanted to know is would you be their Lorelai Gilmore? I guess that's the proper term.
Rory: Really?
Lane: I can't think of anyone who would be better. Plus, you already have the name.
Rory: I'd love to. Yeah.