Kirk Quote #183

Quote from Kirk in Blame Booze and Melville

Kirk: Sally Forth is on fire today. On fire!
Luke: Where did you get a quarter of a million dollars!
Kirk: What? I don't have a quarter of a million dollars.
Luke: You don't?
Kirk: No. Just shy. It's $247,868. Sixty-seven, if I get a couple of donuts to go. Those chocolate raised are calling my name.
Luke: Where the hell did you get that much money?
Kirk: I've been working for eleven years, Luke. I've had fifteen thousand jobs. I've saved every dollar I've ever made. That and the miracle of compound interest has created a bounty of a quarter of a million dollars. Again, just under. I don't want to brag.

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 ‘Blame Booze and Melville’ Quotes

Quote from Emily

Lorelai: Look, Mom, I was mad at you when I did the interview, okay? And I said things but I didn't mean them, it just happened. And I'm not used to talking to reporters. I didn't know about the whole "off the record, on the record" thing. But I know now. And I'm really sorry it happened.
Emily: I did not force Jimmy Carter out of his room at that hotel.
Lorelai: See, now that I thought was just an amusing anecdote.
Emily: I did not get into a, quote, "bitch-fight" with him. He's an ex-president! It was with that insufferable Rosalyn.

Quote from Lorelai

Lorelai: So, there's no machine?
Doctor: Machine?
Lorelai: Yeah, a machine you could stick me in. You know, you're putting pig vessels in people. Isn't there a machine that could tell me right away, away from the prying eyes of the garbage man?
Doctor: You really need to wait and take the test at the proper time.
Lorelai: Okay, see, I'm eating an apple. Now, normally, this would not be a sign of anything except hunger. Except I don't eat much fruit. I know I should, but I don't have a hankering for it. Had it when I was pregnant with my first kid, though. Kept craving those apples. And this morning, boy, was I craving an apple.
Doctor: Well, that could be a sign.
Lorelai: It could?
Doctor: Or not.
Lorelai: [sighs] Okay. You're nice. You're sweet. I've taken up too much of your time. Thank you.

 Kirk Gleason Quotes

Quote from Come Home

Lorelai: Kirk, what are you doing here?
Kirk: Staff meeting.
Lorelai: You don't work here.
Kirk: I thought I might like to go into hotel management someday, and I figured this was a good place to learn.
Lorelai: Oh, Kirk, you can't just crash a staff meeting.
Kirk: [writes] Outsiders cannot crash staff meetings. I'm learning so much.

Quote from Tippecanoe and Taylor, Too

Kirk: I took it upon myself to poll the town, and I think you're gonna be pretty happy with the results.
Sookie: We are?
Kirk: Jackson is solidly in the lead.
Sookie: Already?
Lorelai: We just started bugging people.
Kirk: Well, I modeled my poll after the Gallup poll. The Gallup poll uses a sample of 1,005 voters to represent the 280 million people of the United States. Using that logic, the correct sampling size of the town of Stars Hollow would be 0.002. Rounding that up means one person needs to be polled, so I picked me.
Lorelai: You polled yourself?
Kirk: I was right there. Seemed like a perfect opportunity.