Kirk Quote #165
Kirk: Nothing's up with you two, is there? I mean, you seem just fine.
Lorelai: No, nothing. Nothing's wrong at all. Kirk, we have not broken up.
Kirk: Well, why are you guys dressed up but not together? Luke's in a suit, which seems awfully formal for a movie theater that recycles its popcorn.
Quote from Michel
Sookie: Please, help. You're just standing there.
Michel: I'm staying out of the way. In situations like this, "do not get in the way" is so valuable.
Sookie: Well, get in the way. Entertain the kids.
Michel: Like I'm Sponge Boy Big Pants or something? I do not entertain children.
Quote from Michel
Michel: Wait, twelve? I thought there were six. Six little girls.
Lorelai: Six girls and their six dolls.
Michel: I beg your pardon?
Lorelai: This is a pancake breakfast for the girls and their dolls.
Michel: Get out of town.
Lorelai: I thought you knew that.
Michel: Dolls, as in they don't have stomachs, lungs or spleens? And we are serving them breakfast?
Lorelai: That's right.
Michel: Teeth? Throat? Colons? They don't have these things either? Unless they are Brides of Chucky.
Lorelai: I'm not paying attention to you anymore.
Quote from Blame Booze and Melville
Kirk: Sally Forth is on fire today. On fire!
Luke: Where did you get a quarter of a million dollars!
Kirk: What? I don't have a quarter of a million dollars.
Luke: You don't?
Kirk: No. Just shy. It's $247,868. Sixty-seven, if I get a couple of donuts to go. Those chocolate raised are calling my name.
Luke: Where the hell did you get that much money?
Kirk: I've been working for eleven years, Luke. I've had fifteen thousand jobs. I've saved every dollar I've ever made. That and the miracle of compound interest has created a bounty of a quarter of a million dollars. Again, just under. I don't want to brag.
Quote from Tippecanoe and Taylor, Too
Kirk: I took it upon myself to poll the town, and I think you're gonna be pretty happy with the results.
Sookie: We are?
Kirk: Jackson is solidly in the lead.
Lorelai: We just started bugging people.
Kirk: Well, I modeled my poll after the Gallup poll. The Gallup poll uses a sample of 1,005 voters to represent the 280 million people of the United States. Using that logic, the correct sampling size of the town of Stars Hollow would be 0.002. Rounding that up means one person needs to be polled, so I picked me.
Lorelai: You polled yourself?
Kirk: I was right there. Seemed like a perfect opportunity.