Lorelai: Why don't you go to the mall, walk around a little.
Luke: No. No malls. I hate malls.
Lorelai: Rant number two.
Luke: They underpay employees and overprice merchandise. They contribute to urban sprawl. They encourage materialism. The parking's a horror. You drive in, you pay a buck. And even if you're only there for five...
Lorelai: Okay, Emma Goldman, I'll tell you what. I'll go for you.

Luke: It's Rachel's birthday. Don't say anything. She doesn't want anyone to know. She hates birthdays.
Lorelai: Not as much as she'll hate the potholders.
Luke: I don't know how to buy gifts. I don't like to buy gifts. I don't like getting gifts. I mean, this whole gift-giving-and-getting process is completely insane.
Lorelai: The rant begins.
Luke: I mean, suddenly, on a certain date the level of my affection for a person isn't measured by the way I treat them or what we share. [Lorelai yawns] Just because I didn't buy her furry slippers or a giant shoetree... all of a sudden, I suck.

Luke: I'm not trying anything on.
Lorelai: Hey, it's not like the lumberjack look will ever go out, it won't. But just once, wouldn't it be nice not to be dressed like an extra from Seven Brides for Seven Brothers?