Kirk Quote #200

Quote from Kirk in Welcome to the Doll House

Lorelai: You took me off the map?!
Kirk: All cartographical decisions are strictly the province of the director of tourism.
Lorelai: You and I talked about the street names only this morning. How could the Dragonfly already be off the map?
Kirk: You know the saying: cross the don in the morning, sleep with the fishes in the afternoon. Plus, Taylor has one of those fast laser printers.

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 ‘Welcome to the Doll House’ Quotes

Quote from Michel

Lorelai: Where is all this stupid stuff coming from?
Michel: Looks like classic Home Shopping Channel merchandise to me.
Lorelai: I have not bought anything off the Home Shopping Channel.
Michel: That you remember.
Lorelai: How could I not remember?
Michel: You could be deluding yourself, suppressing a shameful, costly, and yes, extremely tacky shopping addiction from your memory.
Lorelai: I do not have a Home Shopping Channel addiction. This does look familiar, like I've seen it before.
Michel: Mmm-hmm. And was Joan Rivers or Suzanne Somers holding it up?
Lorelai: I'm not buying these things.
Michel: You keep telling yourself that.

Quote from Kirk

Kirk: Well, you can choose any of three historically anchored street names that pre-dated Sores and Boils Alley. It's a generous proposal.
Lorelai: Let's hear them.
Kirk: The first one is Constabulary Road.
Lorelai: Constabulary Road.
Kirk: It's a very nice name. Classic. Very evocative of old-time Stars Hollow.
Lorelai: Yes, it's very nice, but Kirk, that's the exact name of Esther Wilkins' Street. I mean, the exact name. It's taken.
Kirk: I know. Apparently, at one time, there were several streets named Constabulary Road in Stars Hollow.
Lorelai: Yeah, that would be incredibly confusing.
Kirk: Oh, it would be a disaster. It was back then, too. Mail was mis-delivered. Soldiers lost their way. It completely disoriented senior citizens. There was rioting, chaos, death. Everyone hated it.

Quote from Lorelai

Luke: Who? Who is this?
Lorelai: Emily Gilmore.
Luke: You're kidding.
Lorelai: For days, she's been emptying sending me everything she doesn't need anymore, trying to smoke me out of my foxhole.
Luke: Well, call her and tell her to knock it off.
Lorelai: Oh, no. That's exactly what she wants. I poke my head out of the foxhole, it gets blown off. Then I have no head, Luke.
Luke: There's a giant urn in my diner.
Lorelai: It started small. A clock, birdcage, some Victorian figurines, an old telescope. That was the ground war. She was softening me up. Now comes the aerial campaign. The carpet bombing. And I bet she'll bomb me with actual carpets.