Rory: And by the way, bloaty is not a word. There's bloated, there's bloating, but no bloaty.
Shane: Thanks, that's fascinating.
Rory: Well, for you, how ice is made is probably fascinating. See ya.

Luke: On the positive side, you did me a favor. Now I have a pleasant memory from that school: you being nailed like a two by four by a group of sixteen-year-olds.

Luke: Lorelai said you were hiding someone here earlier, she said a girl. Were you?
Jess: Yes.
Luke: Jess, you don't shove a girl in a closet.
Jess: I did not shove her in the closet. She got in voluntarily.
Luke: Oh, sure.
Jess: Look, Shane freaked when she heard you guys coming. Next thing I know, she's in there. I personally didn't care if you guys saw us or not, but hey, women, right? You can't live with 'em, you can't keep 'em from jumping in the closet.
Luke: You and I have got to have a little talk.
Jess: Hey, if you're gonna get all Ward Cleaver on me, I gotta go call Eddie and Lumpy and tell 'em I'm gonna be late.

Lorelai: Is your hair blacker?
Rory: Oh, I wish you hadn't have said that. It's not noticeable, but just stay out of bright lighting.
Lorelai: What happened?
Lane: I dyed my hair. Then I dyed it back, but for a full thirty minutes, I looked like this. [shows Polaroid picture] Whoa, you look cool! You're insane.
Lane: I got sane again, but I will always have that picture. Oh, hide it at your place?
Lorelai: Will do.