Paris: There's no milk in here for my cereal. It's cool. I'll just skip breakfast and suffer the afternoon mood swings.
Logan: I'm sorry, I could have sworn there were like four or five cartons in there.
Paris: Each of these milks is here for a reason. I need the 2% for my cereal, whole milk for my tea, half-and-half for my coffee, skim milk for cooking or baking, plus, I like to keep lactaid on hand for Doyle.
Doyle: Which I don't need because I'm not lactose intolerant.
Paris: You're lactose resistant. You have a bias against lactose. You're sensitive.
Doyle: I'm not sensitive. I have no problem with lactose.
Paris: There's nothing wrong with being sensitive. Jake Gyllenhaal is sensitive. Orlando Bloom is sensitive.

Sookie: Michel, you can't put your schedules in the front of the basket. It's blocking everything.
Michel: So?
Sookie: So it shouldn't block everything. It doesn't look good.
Michel: [chuckles] Yes, it does. I am a man of refine and renown . Aesthetic Fabien Baron once publicly admired the way I decorated my locker at crunch. I worked extremely hard on these schedules, and it looks good.
Sookie: Yes, the schedules look nice, okay. Lovely font choice, lovely use of bullet points, but give me a break it's not like you made them on an antique printing press or something.
Michel: Oh, I'm sorry. Did you make your chocolate-dipped apricots on an antique printing press?
Sookie: Ha ha. No, of course not.
Michel: Touché.

Lorelai: We didn't schedule any bird-watching, did we?
Michel: There was a void. On the schedule there was nothing scheduled on Saturday evening. It looks ridiculous so I wrote in bird-watching.
Lorelai: Oh, that's clever. Except for the fact we didn't schedule any bird-watching.
Michel: So?
Lorelai: So what if people want to do some bird-watch?
Michel: Oh, please. No one will want to go bird-watching.
Lorelai: How do you know?
Michel: Who wants to watch birds? Why on earth would you watch a bird?

Lorelai: Oh, you know what should be on here is hay-bale maze.
Sookie: I can't believe we're actually having a hay-bale maze.
Michel: Oh, what is wrong with people? Walking in hay? Don't they have lives? Don't they have televisions and elliptical machines?

Michel: Oh! Whatever.
Sookie: Michel, people stopped saying "whatever" like two years ago.
Michel: Whatever. I'm Audi 5000.

Logan: Man, you look great. That is one smart-looking suit.
Rory: Well, let's hope that it does most of the talking because I keep thinking of questions that they might ask me, and this lovely little thing keeps happening where my mind goes completely blank. You know it's like "Rory, what journalists do you admire?" " [clears throat] What journalists do I admire?" And nothing. It's a blank. It's like a snowstorm in here. It's all white and empty.
Logan: [to Rory] You're gonna be great.
Doyle: Absolutely.
Paris: Or you'll choke. [off their looks] What? It's your first big interview. You very well may panic. I'm just saying, don't panic if you panic.
Rory: Ah that's so sweet, Paris.

Rory: [on the phone] Hey, Michel. How's it going?
Michel: Middling to poor. Where are you? I hear noise.
Rory: I'm on a train on my way back from Providence.
Michel: Oh.
Rory: What?
Michel: I do not care for trains.
Rory: Oh, no? I'm sorry.
Michel: Trains are dirty.
Rory: Well, this train doesn't look very dirty.
Michel: You know what I find particularly disgusting?
Rory: What?
Michel: Train tracks. They remind me somehow of trails left behind by slugs. You know there are a lot of slugs in the spring, you know? Oozing all over the place. Uh, I think your mother is done now.

Rory: [on the phone] I met the editor, Kate Hessel, and she invited me in. I sat down, we started talking, and we just had so much to talk about. It was great. It was an amazing interview.
Lorelai: Wow, that's great.
Rory: It was we talked about Seymour Hersh and how he was comparing Iran to Nicaragua and the contra war. And everything, from Alexander Haig and Watergate to the Oprah phenomenon. And the best part was I was just being myself, you know? I was just talking, and I forgot about impressing her.
Lorelai: But there you were, impressing her.
Rory: Yeah, and she said she'd call me by tomorrow to let me know whether or not I got the job.

Lorelai: Okay I circled some stuff in the paper for you, though, so you'd have stuff to do. There's some movies if you feel like going to the movies. And, um, I noticed that the colonial butter churners are having an exhibition at the antiquarian society. That could be kind of funny. And, um, then there will be a lot to do tomorrow with the festival and everything. There will be games and face-painting and stuff like that...
Rory: Mom.
Lorelai: What? You've lived here before?
Rory: Yeah, I think I remember enough to show Logan around. This is the town with the Sistine chapel, right?
Lorelai: Oh, yeah and don't forget to show him the Pyramids, Kitty-corner from the Wailing wall.

Lorelai: Well I have the town meeting, but I'll be home after. I will wow you with my takeout-ordering skills.
Rory: She really is amazing.
Lorelai: There's talk of a show on the Food Network.
Logan: Sounds great.
Lorelai: And you have some guest towels there.
Rory: Oh, I didn't know we had guest towels.
Lorelai: Of course. "Guest towels." A fancy way of saying "towels that are clean."