Lorelai: I can't believe you didn't dress crazy like we agreed.
Rory: We never agreed to dress crazy.
Lorelai: What are you talking about? We did so, on the phone last night when we made our lunch plans.
Rory: You saying, "Hey, let's dress crazy," does not equate to us agreeing to dress crazy.
Lorelai: For years, it did.
Rory: Well, for years, you bought my clothes for me, so I had very little choice in the matter.
Lorelai: Oh, so typical. Kid grows up, goes to a fancy school, becomes a snob, and is suddenly ashamed of her mother. You totally Mildred Pierced me.
Rory: I did not Mildred Pierce you.
Lorelai: Oh, you'll miss me when I'm gone.

Lorelai: So you want to know how they took it?
Rory: No.
Lorelai: They took it great. Mom practically broke the phone, she hung up so hard. And Dad... Well, Dad was solemn, quiet, sad. It was a huge success. Okay, here's how I see it. You and your grandparents are at a huge crossroads, a precipice, if you will. They are the bridges of Madison County, and you are Meryl Streep.
Rory: As the paper pages go flying off the calendar.

Kirk: European hot chocolate. It's like mud but chocolaty.

Emily: You know what else I find amusing?
Lorelai: Reno 911!?
Emily: I find it very amusing that Christopher is suddenly such a wonderful person.
Lorelai: Mom!
Emily: It seems to me that when I was in cahoots with him, everyone thought that I was a villain, and now you're in cahoots with him, and that's perfectly fine.
Lorelai: Please don't say "cahoots" anymore. It's disturbing.

Emily: So I lead her over to the good table, smiling like we are the best friends in the world, and I tell her, Shira, you don't think Rory is good enough to be in your family? "She is. We are just as good as you are. After all, you are nothing but a two-bit gold digger, and how you managed to bag Mitchum I will never know."
Lorelai: You did not.
Richard: Oh, yes, she did. I told her Mitchum still plays around.
Lorelai: Oh, no.
Richard: Tell her exactly what you said.
Emily: What did I say?
Richard: About her weight going...
Emily: Oh, yes, yes. I got it. I told her, "Mitchum still plays around, you know. Well, of course you know. That's why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every 3 months."
Richard: Ruthless woman!
Lorelai: I bow to the foot of the master.
Emily: I only wished I'd remembered to call her a cocktail waitress.
Lorelai: Ooh, ooh, that's my mother's version of the "C" word.

Luke: You're being evasive.
Lorelai: [sighs] I'm not being evasive. I'm trying to remain mysterious so you still find me interesting 100 years from now.
Luke: Why won't you tell me where you're going?
Lorelai: Well... I'm going to the flower mart.
Luke: Why?
Lorelai: Because I'm meeting Sookie there because we were going to get ideas for flowers for the wedding.
Luke: Oh.
Lorelai: That is now postponed.

Lorelai: The wedding has been postponed.
Sookie: What did you do?
Lorelai: What did I do?
Sookie: Did you get cold feet? You can't get cold feet. We need to put some nice wool socks on those feet, because Luke is perfect for you.

Rory: You've been hanging out at this coffee cart every day for a week.
Logan: Yes, it's sad. I'm officially a wuss. If I saw me doing this, I'd beat the crap out of myself.
Rory: You have nothing better to do with your time?
Logan: Nothing better than to try and get you back, no.
Rory: You're too slick for your own good, Huntzberger.
Logan: Excuse me. But this is not slick. This is a Nora Ephron movie. Louis Armstrong should be warbling as we talk.

Rory: How 'bout Thursday night?
Logan: Really?
Rory: Yeah. I'll have turned in my article for the Daily News, and my Friday morning history class was canceled this week.
Logan: Okay, great. Thursday it is. 7:30. And do not think of backing out, because I will cry and eat a pint of rocky road while watching An Affair to Remember with Rita Wilson.
Rory: Of course.

Lorelai: Paul Anka, mommy's home! She comes bearing kibble! Hey, where are you?! Oh, no. What have you done? You're hiding. That means you've done something weird. Oh, seriously? You know, some dogs dig! It might be a nice change of pace!
Babette: [on answer machine] Hey, sugar. I heard some terrible crashing sounds coming from your living room today. I tried to get in, but Luke fixed the back door, so you can't jiggle it off the hinge anymore. You should really talk to him about that, sweetie. I hope everything's okay. Call me later if it's not. Bye-bye, toots!