Paris: Relax, I'm okay with you making valedictorian over me.
Rory: Oh, good, thanks.
Paris: Sure. I actually googled the personal histories of Ivy League valedictorians going back twenty-five years, and found some enlightening statistics. They don't necessarily do too well in later life, did you know that?
Rory: No.
Paris: Oh, yeah. A lot of business failures, crumbled marriages, suicides, obesity. A bunch died in car crashes, several did time, one suffocated when his cat fell asleep on his face.
Rory: Okay, well, thanks again.