Luke: Something that's supposed to start nice. Two people promising each other: "I love you forever. I want to die when you die. My life meant nothing until you used my toothbrush." And then it starts.
Lorelai: Well, that's not exactly...
Luke: Who do you invite? Who sits where? Open bar? Yes or no?
Lorelai: Luke.
Luke: Auntie Juny doesn't eat chicken. Uncle Momo's off his meds.
Lorelai: Juny and Momo?
Luke: Just an example.
Lorelai: Of a retired circus couple?
Luke: And then after all that planning, the reception will still be a disaster. Because no matter what you do or how carefully you plan, halfway through one of those nauseating Bette Midler ballads someone's getting drunk, someone's sleeping with someone else's wife, and a chicken Kiev lands on the cake.
Lorelai: You know, the Gettysburg Address was only one page long, and that was about a war.
Luke: I just call them like I see them.