Luke: It's Rachel's birthday. Don't say anything. She doesn't want anyone to know. She hates birthdays.
Lorelai: Not as much as she'll hate the potholders.
Luke: I don't know how to buy gifts. I don't like to buy gifts. I don't like getting gifts. I mean, this whole gift-giving-and-getting process is completely insane.
Lorelai: The rant begins.
Luke: I mean, suddenly, on a certain date the level of my affection for a person isn't measured by the way I treat them or what we share. [Lorelai yawns] Just because I didn't buy her furry slippers or a giant shoetree... all of a sudden, I suck.