Kirk: Luke, check it out. I've been published.
Luke: You have?
Kirk: Mother wanted to sell her dinette set, so I put pen to paper, got my creative juices flowing, and voila.
Luke: You put a want ad in the Stars Hollow Gazette?
Kirk: It's a powerful feeling seeing yourself immortalized in print. Sure, it's only newsprint. It rips easily, it comes off on your fingers, and the next day, people use it to wrap fish, but, hey, it's how Dickens got started.
Luke: In want ads?
Kirk: Man, this thing really flows. "Vintage dinette set, formica, barely chipped, priced to move." It's precise, efficient, Hemingwayesque in its terse simplicity. Hey, with two buns in the oven, you wouldn't be interested in a dinette set, would you? Seats four.
Zach: No, thanks, man.