Trending Friends Quotes

Quote from Joey in The One After Vegas

Joey: Where is the waitress? I'm starving.
Chandler: It's a buffet, man.
Joey: Oh, here's where I win all my money back!


Quote from Phoebe in The One with Phoebe's Birthday Dinner

Rachel: Well, now that everybody has ordered, I would like to start the celebration and make a toast to Phoebe. She dropped her sock.
Phoebe: Aw. What?
Rachel: No. No, Emma dropped her sock.
Monica: Mom's here? I wanted to have lunch with her today. She told me she was out of town.
Rachel: Ross, she still has not noticed that the baby's sock is on the ground.
Phoebe: It's a good toast.
Rachel: Look, will you please get her attention?
Ross: Oh. Mommy? Mother. [mouths] Sock.
Phoebe: Oh, for God's sake. Judy, pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock!

Quote from Joey in The One with the Truth About London

Joey: Anyway, I started on what I'm gonna say for the ceremony. You want to hear it?
Monica: Yeah.
Joey: Listen, this is just the first draft, so... "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share." Eh? "It is a love based on giving and receiving as well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving, we too can share and love and have and receive."
Chandler: [to Monica] Should we call the spitter?

Quote from Joey in The One with the Pediatrician

Chandler: What's the matter, Joe?
Joey: I'm mad at you for leaving. You know, you're nothing but a big leaver. A big leaver with a stupid suitcase.
Chandler: Any chance you're trying to pick a fight to make all of this easier?
Joey: Aw, dude, you see right through me!

Quote from Dr. Green in The One with the Stripper

Waiter: Your '74 Lafite, sir.
Dr. Green: '74? I ordered the '75. That's a magnificent wine. The '74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage? Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why you're a waiter?
Waiter: This is why I told the manager I wouldn't wait on you tonight.
Dr. Green: Oh, come on. Don't be such a baby.

Quote from Phoebe in The Where Rachel Rachel Goes Back to Work

Phoebe: Hey, Joey, could I have a sip of your coffee and a bite of your muffin?
Joey: Okay.
Phoebe: Thank you. [Phoebe pours Joey's coffee into a thermos and takes his muffin] Thank you.
Joey: Pheebs, have you ever been bitten by a hungry Italian?
Phoebe: I'm sorry. It's just, I'm a little short on cash.
Joey: Well, if you want, I could loan you some money.
Phoebe: Oh, no. No, I learned never to borrow money from friends. That's why Richard Dreyfuss and I don't speak anymore.

Quote from Ross in The One Where Chandler Takes a Bath

Ross: But it wouldn't hurt to have a backup, you know? Rach. Rach, what were you thinking?
Rachel: Okay. I was thinking if it's a girl how about Sandrene? It's French.
Ross: Huh. That's a really pretty name for an industrial solvent.

Quote from Rachel in The One with Rachel's Book

Rachel: Joey, what are you doing going into my bedroom?
Joey: I'm sorry. I went in there to take a nap. And I know I shouldn't have, but you got porn.
Rachel: Hey. You know what? I don't care. I'm not ashamed of my book. There's nothing wrong with a woman enjoying a little erotica. It's a healthy expression of female sexuality, which, by the way, is something that you will never understand.
Joey: You got porn.

Quote from Chandler in The One with Rachel's New Dress

Chandler: From now on, I have no first name.
Joey: So you're just Bing?
Chandler: I have no name.

Quote from Mike in The One with Princess Consuela

Phoebe: Good for you. That was really mature.
Joey: What? No. The only reason I am going to their stupid new house, is so I can point out everything that's wrong with it, so they don't move. I am gonna make them stay here.
Mike: You're a strange kind of grown up.

Quote from Phoebe in The One After 'I Do'

Phoebe: Well, I just got off the phone with my lover, James Brolin.
Monica: Oh, really?
Phoebe: Yes. And apparently he is married to some singer. But he said he would leave her for me. So I said, "James. James Brolin, are you sure?" And James Brolin said-
Monica: Rachel's really the one who's pregnant?
Phoebe: What? ... Why bother?

Quote from Phoebe in The One Where Everybody Finds Out

Phoebe: Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler. Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! Oh! Oh! Oh! Chandler and Monica! Chandler and Monica!
Rachel: Oh, my God!
Phoebe: Chandler and Monica!
Rachel: Oh, my God!
Phoebe: Oh, my eyes! My eyes!

Quote from Joey in The One with Phoebe's Uterus

Joey: So, what job did you get, Joey?
Joey: Tour guide at the museum. Ross got it for me.
Rachel: Well, how can you be tour guide? Don't you have to be a dinosaur expert or something?
Joey: Not really. They give you all the information. It's like memorizing a script. And on your left you have a tyrannosaurus rex, a carnivore from the Jurassic Period.
Chandler: Very nice.
Ross: Yeah, actually, Joey, it's the Cretaceous Period.
Joey: Yeah, but I can pronounce Jurassic.

Quote from Joey in The One with the Screamer

Joey: And so, I'm gonna get on this spaceship and I'm gonna go to Blaargon-7 in search of alternative fuels. But when I return, you'll be long gone but I won't have aged at all. So you tell your great, great granddaughter, to look me up. Because, Adrianne, baby, I'm gonna want to meet her.

Quote from Judy Geller in The One with the Sonogram at the End

Ross: Look, I realize you guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me. And so, well, here's the deal. Carol's a lesbian. She's living with a woman named Susan.
She's pregnant with my child. And she and Susan are going to raise the baby.
Judy Geller: [to Monica] And you knew about this?