Dr. Green: How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't eat meat.
Dr. Green: It's chicken.
Phoebe: Yeah, I don't eat that either.
Dr. Green: I'll never understand you lesbians.

Rachel: This was such a huge mistake. I can't tell him, Phoebe. I can't. I can't. I can't.
Phoebe: Rachel, no it's okay-
Rachel: Here's what's gonna happen. I'm gonna wait a couple of years, and then the baby will tell him.
Phoebe: Why? So he can get mad at the baby?
Rachel: Hey, that is the baby's problem.

Monica: Oh, my God, you are gonna love me so much. I felt really bad about the whole bachelorette party thing. So tonight you're gonna have a bachelor party.
Chandler: What?
Monica: Yeah, I got this number from a guy at work and I hired a stripper to come dance for you. Am I going in the wife hall of fame or what?

Dr. Green: This is unacceptable, Rachel. And I wanna know why! Is it because that punk, Ross, won't marry you? That's it. Is that it?
Rachel: Yes. Yes. He says I'm damaged goods.

Dr. Green: You think you can knock up my daughter and then not marry her? I ought to kill you!
Ross: You know, this is actually not a great time for me.

Joey: All right, maybe you should just ask her to leave.
Chandler: Why me?
Joey: Hey, it's your bachelor party.
Chandler: Which is why you should do it.
Joey: I don't want to. You do it.
Chandler: You do it.
Joey: You do it.
Chandler: All right. Rock, paper, scissors for who has to tell the whore to leave. ... What?
Joey: I miss this.
Chandler: I don't think we've actually done this before.

Rachel: Mona, just hear me out. First of all, I am so sorry about my father yelling at you. But I heard that you totally held your own. You're gonna have to tell me how you did that.

Mona: I just don't want to get in the middle of something so complicated.
Rachel: I get it. But, Mona, what relationship is not complicated? I mean, we all have our baggage. You must too. Why else would you still be single? I'm so gonna leave right now.

Mona: Why didn't you just tell me about all this?
Ross: Because, what's going on with Rachel has nothing to do with how I feel about you.
Mona: Well, you still should have told me.
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that heard it from Rachel's father.

Monica: I swear I didn't know she was a hooker. I mean- Did you let her smoke in her?
Chandler: Her ass-print is still on your grandmother's quilt. Do you really want to talk about smoking?