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‘The One with the Sonogram at the End’ Quotes

Friends: The One with the Sonogram at the End

102. The One with the Sonogram at the End

Aired September 29, 1994

Still getting over his divorce from Carol, Ross is shocked to learn she is pregnant with his child. Meanwhile, Monica struggles with the pressure of a visit from her and Ross's parents, in whose eyes he can do no wrong, and Rachel plucks up the courage to return Barry's engagement ring.

Quote from Jack Geller

Judy Geller: What that Rachel did to her life. We ran into her parents at the club. They were not playing well.
Jack Geller: I'm not going to tell you what they spent on that wedding, but $40,000 is a lot of money.

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Quote from Judy Geller

Ross: Look, I realize you guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me. And so, well, here's the deal. Carol's a lesbian. She's living with a woman named Susan.
She's pregnant with my child. And she and Susan are going to raise the baby.
Judy Geller: [to Monica] And you knew about this?

Quote from Chandler

Chandler: Oh, I think this is the episode Three's Company where there's some kind of misunderstanding.
Phoebe: Then I've already seen this one.

Quote from Chandler

Monica: Whose ball of paper is this?
Chandler: Mine. You see, I wrote a note to myself, then I didn't need it. So I balled it up and now I wish I was dead.

Quote from Chandler

Monica: Chandler, you're an only child, right? You don't have any of this?
Chandler: Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend who my parents actually preferred.

Quote from Rachel

Monica: You don't understand. For us, kissing is as important as any part of it.
Joey: Yeah, right! You serious?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah.
Rachel: Everything you need to know is in that first kiss.
Monica: Absolutely.
Chandler: I think for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act. I mean, it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out.
Ross: And it's not that we don't like the comedian. It's just that, that's not why we bought the ticket.
Chandler: You see the problem is, though, no matter how great the show was, you girls are looking for the comedian again. I mean, we're in the car, fighting traffic, basically just trying to stay awake.
Rachel: Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise, next time you'll find yourself listening to that album alone. [Rachel high fives Monica]
Joey: Are we still talking about sex?

Quote from Chandler

Monica: Look, I'm sorry, guys, I just don't wanna give them any more ammunition than they already have.
Chandler: Yes, and we all know how cruel a parent can be about the flatness of a child's pillow.

Quote from Chandler

Rachel: I know I had it this morning. I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with-
Chandler: Dinah?

Quote from Judy Geller

Judy Geller: Mmm. What's that curry taste?
Monica: Curry.
Judy Geller: [unconvincingly] Mmm.

Quote from Monica

Monica: I'm sorry, why is this girl going to call me?
Judy Geller: She just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking or food, or ... I don't know. Anyway, I told her you have a restaurant-
Monica: No, mom, I don't have a restaurant, I work in a restaurant.
Judy Geller: Well, they don't have to know that.

Quote from Monica

Monica: I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish on my part, but were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take some of the heat off of me.

Quote from Judy Geller

Judy Geller: Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar.
Monica: What's that supposed to mean?
Judy Geller: Nothing. It's an expression.
Monica: No, it's not.

Quote from Jack Geller

Jack Geller: Don't listen to your mother. You're independent, you always have been. Even when you were a kid and you were chubby, and you had no friends, you were just fine. And you would read alone in your room and your puzzles.

Quote from Jack Geller

Jack Geller: Look, there are people, like Ross, who need to shoot for the stars. With his museum and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are.
I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer.

Quote from Jack Geller

Jack Geller: And I read read about these women trying to have it all, and I thank God, our little "Harmonica" doesn't seem to have that problem.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: It's worse when you're twins.
Rachel: You're a twin?
Phoebe: We don't speak. She's like this high-powered, driven, career-type.
Joey: What does she do?
Phoebe: She's a waitress.

Quote from Ross

Susan: Oh, pease, what's wrong with Helen?
Ross: Helen Geller? I don't think so.
Carol: Well, it's not gonna be Helen Geller.
Ross: Thank you.
Carol: No, I mean, it's not Geller.
Ross: What, it'll be Helen Willick?
Carol: No, actually, we talked about Helen Willick Bunch.
Ross: Wait a minute. Why is she in the title?
Susan: Because it's my baby too.
Ross: Really? I don't remember you making any sperm.
Susan: And we all know what a challenge that is.
Carol: Okay, you two, stop it.
Ross: No, she gets a credit. I'm in there too.

Quote from Ross

Ross: So, how's this all gonna work, when important decisions have to be made?
Carol: Give me a "for instance."
Ross: Well, I don't know. How about with the baby's name?
Carol: Marlon. If it's a boy. Minnie, if it's a girl.
Ross: As in "Mouse"?
Carol: As in my grandmother.
Ross: Still, you say "Minnie," you hear "Mouse."
Ross: How about- How about Julia?
Carol: Julia.
Susan: We agreed on Minnie.
Ross: It's funny, we agreed we'd spend our lives together. Things change. Roll with the punches.

Quote from Jack Geller

Jack Geller: They’re happy with what they have. Basically, they’re content. Like cows.
Ross: Cows, dad?
Jack Geller: She knows how much I like cows.

Quote from Chandler

Rachel: Oh, don't be mad.
Monica: You didn't.
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry.
Monica: I gave you one job!
Rachel: But look how straight those noodles are.
Chandler: You know that's not how you look for an engagement ring in a lasagna.
Monica: I just can't do it.
Chandler: Boys? We're going in.


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