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‘The One with the Routine’ Quotes

Friends: The One with the Routine

610. The One with the Routine

Aired December 16, 1999

When Janine lands a role as a dancer on Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve, she invites Joey, Ross and Monica to join her. Meanwhile, Phoebe, Rachel and Chandler try to find Monica's Christmas presents for them.

Quote from Rachel

Janine: Do you guys want to come too?
Ross: Are you serious?
Monica: We are there.
[Rachel laughing]
Chandler: What are you laughing at?
Rachel: Well, I used to date him, but you're still going out with her.

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Quote from Ross

Rachel: Well, that's a lot better than Ross trying to kiss me in high school and saying that he did it because he needed Chap Stick.
Ross: It was a dry day.

Quote from Joey

Tall Guy: Hey, guy. You got about three seconds to get away from my partner.
Stage Manager: What's going on here?
Joey: Take a look at the guy's pants. Uh, I know you told us to show excitement, but don't you think he went a little overboard?
Stage Manager: What's the matter with you? Get out of here.
Joey: Yeah, take a hike, wet pants!

Quote from Rachel

Ross: And that's the story of the dreidel. Now, some people trace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches into huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolizing life's triumph over death. And that was, like, 4000 years ago.
Rachel: So, pretty much around the same time that you started telling this story.

Quote from Chandler

Joey: I had to get out of the apartment. Janine is, like, stretching all over the place. You know, everywhere I look she's like... [Joey poorly demonstrates some stretches]
Chandler: I can see why that's hard to resist.
Joey: I like her so much.
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie, that she doesn't feel the same.
Joey: I know. And she's so sweet. I just want to feed her grapes and brush her hair.
Chandler: You are aware that she's not a monkey, right?

Quote from Chandler

Monica: We are going to Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin ' Eve!
Ross: Oh, my God!
Monica: Oh, my God!
Chandler: Oh, my God!

Quote from Joey

Joey: So when is it going to air?

Quote from Rachel

Rachel: Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Chandler: No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
Phoebe: Oh, that's it? A great idea? Oh, yeah?
Rachel: Chandler, that's not enough. I mean, what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents and then a bunch of little presents, and you've just gotten her one great present? I mean, that's just going to make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her, Chandler? Why? Why?
Chandler: If I help, we can find them faster.
Rachel: That's right.

Quote from Chandler

Rachel: We are so gonna find them this year.
Chandler: You know when you guys said you were gonna go across the hall and look, you don't do that every year do you?
Rachel: Yeah.
Chandler: You don't, like, go into the back of my closet and look under my gym bag or anything?
Rachel: No. Never do that.
[Phoebe and Rachel start laughing]
Chandler: Because that's where Joey gave me stuff to store that I've never seen in my life. Okay, that did not just happen.

Quote from Monica

Ross: What'd you guys do to get up on there?
Woman: We learned how to dance.
Monica: Oh, yeah? Well when you learned how to dance, did you forget how to put on underpants?

Quote from Phoebe

Rachel: Yeah, we found them. They were in the guest room closet behind some coats.
Phoebe: And you have nothing to worry about because they're all crap.
Chandler: Those are my gifts. I got those for you.
Phoebe: Oh. Thanks, Chandler, they're great.
Rachel: Well, Chandler, what is this very weird metal A-Z thing?
Chandler: Those are bookends. That's a great gift.
Phoebe: Oh. Okay, I'm sorry. Thank you for my "az."

Quote from Rachel

Chandler: Just make sure you put all that stuff back in the closet.
Rachel: Yes, okay. Oh, by the way, I just got to say I think it's really nice of you that even after you've moved you still keep storing that stuff for Joey.

Quote from Ross

Monica: Excuse me, sir. Would it help if I weren't wearing underpants?
Ross: Monica! Would it?

Quote from Ross

Ross: Hey, I know what'll get us up on a platform.
Monica: What?
Ross: The routine!
Monica: Ross, we haven't done the routine since middle school.
Ross: Hey, when the snippy guy sees the routine he'll want to build us our own platform.
Monica: Was it really that good?
Ross: We got honorable mention in the brother/sister dance category.

Quote from Monica

Ross: When the music starts up, I was thinking about maybe going into the robot.
Monica: Ross? I think we should stick to the routine. We don't want to look stupid.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: Hey, look who I found.
Chandler: Oh, hi, guys.
Phoebe: You know, birds have a very good sense of direction, so I thought maybe they could help us find the presents.
Chandler: Yes, if the presents are hidden south for the winter.
Phoebe: Or we could just follow your clever jokes. Any ideas? No? Didn't think so.

Quote from Phoebe

Chandler: Well, the duck seems to think that Monica got me garbage. I wonder what I could get Monica that's as good as garbage.
Phoebe: Hmm. How about my "az"?

Quote from Monica

Phoebe: Ooh, ooh. We have a live one.
Rachel: Oh, it's a Macy's bag.
Phoebe: Yeah. Ooh, who's it for?
Rachel: "Dear Losers, do you really think I'd hide presents under the couch? P.S. Chandler, I knew they'd break you."
Phoebe: Uh-oh. She may be onto us.


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