TV Quotes

Janine: Do you guys want to come too?
Ross: Are you serious?
Monica: We are there.
[Rachel laughing]
Chandler: What are you laughing at?
Rachel: Well, I used to date him, but you're still going out with her.

Rachel: Well, that's a lot better than Ross trying to kiss me in high school and saying that he did it because he needed Chap Stick.
Ross: It was a dry day.

Tall Guy: Hey, guy. You got about three seconds to get away from my partner.
Stage Manager: What's going on here?
Joey: Take a look at the guy's pants. Uh, I know you told us to show excitement, but don't you think he went a little overboard?
Stage Manager: What's the matter with you? Get out of here.
Joey: Yeah, take a hike, wet pants!

Ross: And that's the story of the dreidel. Now, some people trace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches into huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolizing life's triumph over death. And that was, like, 4000 years ago.
Rachel: So, pretty much around the same time that you started telling this story.

Joey: I had to get out of the apartment. Janine is, like, stretching all over the place. You know, everywhere I look she's like... [Joey poorly demonstrates some stretches]
Chandler: I can see why that's hard to resist.
Joey: I like her so much.
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie, that she doesn't feel the same.
Joey: I know. And she's so sweet. I just want to feed her grapes and brush her hair.
Chandler: You are aware that she's not a monkey, right?

Monica: We are going to Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin ' Eve!
Ross: Oh, my God!
Monica: Oh, my God!
Chandler: Oh, my God!

Joey: So when is it going to air?

Rachel: Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Chandler: No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
Phoebe: Oh, that's it? A great idea? Oh, yeah?
Rachel: Chandler, that's not enough. I mean, what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents and then a bunch of little presents, and you've just gotten her one great present? I mean, that's just going to make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her, Chandler? Why? Why?
Chandler: If I help, we can find them faster.
Rachel: That's right.

Rachel: We are so gonna find them this year.
Chandler: You know when you guys said you were gonna go across the hall and look, you don't do that every year do you?
Rachel: Yeah.
Chandler: You don't, like, go into the back of my closet and look under my gym bag or anything?
Rachel: No. Never do that.
[Phoebe and Rachel start laughing]
Chandler: Because that's where Joey gave me stuff to store that I've never seen in my life. Okay, that did not just happen.

Ross: What'd you guys do to get up on there?
Woman: We learned how to dance.
Monica: Oh, yeah? Well when you learned how to dance, did you forget how to put on underpants?