Phoebe: Okay. I'd also like to try on the tiara. Oh, yeah. Okay. What do you think? Wow. Too much?
Jeweler: A tad.
Phoebe: Okay, then take the tiara back and let me hold the musket again.

Paul: Chandler, did your dad ever hug you?
Chandler: No. Did he hug you?
Paul: No. No. It's just that my dad never did. I miss my dad.
Chandler: Well, you can see my dad in Vegas kissing other dads.

Phoebe: Chandler, I found the perfect ring.
Chandler: Oh, that's pretty nice, but I'm gonna go with the one I picked first.
Phoebe: Oh, wake up, Chandler. The one you picked is gone. It's over.
Chandler: What? Some guy bought it. I'm sorry. I tried to stop him but they put me in jail.
Chandler: They put you in jail?
Phoebe: The little jail between the doors!
Chandler: Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring.
Phoebe: I know. I'm sorry. But this ring is better. And Monica never even saw the other ring.
Chandler: Yeah. But when he proposed to me with the ring, I got goosebumps.
Phoebe: Maybe it was the guy.
Chandler: It was the ring!

Phoebe: There may be a way we could get the other ring back. Because I heard the guy tell the jeweler where he was going to propose. So maybe we could get him to trade rings or something.
Chandler: I can't do that.
Phoebe: Well, you certainly can't give her that stupid gumball ring.

Phoebe: There he is.
Chandler: Okay and he hasn't proposed yet because she has no ring on her finger.
Phoebe: Wow, you're good! After this, we should solve crimes.
Chandler: Yeah.

Chandler: This is my fiancee, and her heart was set on that ring. Do you want to break her heart?
Phoebe: Yeah. Do you want to break a dying woman's heart?
Guy: You're dying? [Phoebe starts coughing]
Chandler: Yeah, she's dying ... of a cough, apparently.
Phoebe: Yes and it is my dying wish to have that ring. See, if I'm not buried with that ring, then my spirit is going to wander the netherworld for all eternity.
Chandler: Okay, that's enough, honey.

Ross: God, that ring Chandler picked out was so beautiful.
Phoebe: Yeah, you should know. You've bought like a billion of them.
Ross: Ah, humor based on my pain.
Rachel: You know what's funny? Of all of your wives, I'm the only one who never got a ring.
Ross: This, uh, a big issue for you? Or what?
Rachel: No, but, you know, it would have been nice to have a little memento of our married time together. Something other than the divorce papers and the hangover.

Chandler: Pheebs, can you help me pick out an engagement ring for Monica?
I can't figure this out. It's so hard. Should I get her a Tiffany cut, or a princess cut or a- Ow, ow. Paper cut!

Rachel: I just want to know what is behind this strong, silent exterior? They say that still waters run deep, and I want to swim in yours.
Paul: Are you talking about having sex?

Rachel: But what do you say we go share some food?
Paul: No, I couldn't eat now.
Rachel: What are you talking about? You love their Kung Pao chicken.
Paul: Chicken? Chicken Boy!
Rachel: I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that. [Paul sobs]