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‘The One with the Red Sweater’ Quotes Page 1 of 4    

Friends: The One with the Red Sweater

802. The One with the Red Sweater

Aired October 4, 2001

After Rachel refuses to reveal the father of her baby until she's told him, Phoebe and Joey do some detective work. Meanwhile, Ross helps Chandler to recreate the pictures from the wedding after he loses the disposable cameras, and Monica opens all their presents without Chandler.

Quote from Joey

Rachel: Listen, you know what? Sir, for the last time, I don't care what the computer says. We did not take a bag of Mashuga Nuts from the mini bar. And we did not watch Dr. Do-Me-A-Little.
Joey: Hey.
Phoebe: Uh, Joey, were you in our room last night?
Joey: No. [Phoebe shows Joey the bill they're challenging] I was told the name of movie would not appear on the bill.


Quote from Joey

Front Desk Clerk: Here's a copy of your bill.
Monica: Oh, thanks. Champagne, strawberries- Oh, my God! I can't believe Chandler ordered porn on our wedding night.
Joey: Yeah, that's sad. Mashuga Nut?

Quote from Phoebe

Monica: Hey, how are you feeling? Got any morning sickness?
Rachel: Ssh. The guys don't know, do they?
Monica: No. Joey and Ross don't know anything and Chandler still thinks Phoebe's pregnant.
Phoebe: Hey, that's right. Chandler does still think I'm pregnant. He hasn't asked me how I'm feeling, or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him. After you, of course.

Quote from Joey

Rachel: Hey, Joey, what would you do if someone you slept with told you she was pregnant?
Joey: Who called here? Did she sound blond? Did she have an accent? I gotta make a call. I should have never walked into that Sunglass Hut!

Quote from Phoebe

Joey: What the hell's going on? Is somebody pregnant?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. That's me.
Joey: Oh, my God, Pheebs. You're gonna have a baby?
Phoebe: Yes. Yes, I am. Oh, my God, I'm gonna have a baby.
Joey: Wait a minute, who's the father?
Phoebe: You don't know him. It's not important. He wants nothing to do with me or the baby.
Joey: Who is this guy? Who is this guy? Because I will track him down and kick his ass!
Phoebe: David Linn.
Joey: David Linn! David Linn! David Linn!
Monica: Who's David Linn?
Phoebe: Oh, some guy from my gym. Little annoying.

Quote from Phoebe

Joey: Pheebs? Listen. Sit down, I got something I want to say.
Phoebe: All right.
Joey: It's a scary world out there, especially for a single mom. Now, I always felt that you and I have a special bond. So, Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
Monica: Oh, my God! Joey!
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, I'll marry you.
Monica: You can't marry him!
Phoebe: Hey, lady, your day's over, it's my turn.
Monica: Phoebe!
Joey: What? Why can't she marry me?
Phoebe: I can and I will.
Monica: She's not pregnant. It's Rachel. Rachel's the one who's pregnant, okay.
Joey: Oh, my God.
Phoebe: Hey!
Monica: Phoebe, I think he'd notice when you didn't have a baby in nine months.
Phoebe: It's Joey! [mouths] I love you!

Quote from Joey

Joey: Hey, Rach, listen. No matter what this guy says. I want you to know, you're not going to be alone in this.
Rachel: I'm not?
Joey: No. Listen. It's a scary world out there, especially for a single mom. I've always felt like you and I have this special bond, you know. Rachel Green, will you marry me?
Rachel: What?
Monica: What?
Phoebe: What?!
Joey: Pheebs, give me the ring back.
Phoebe: No!

Quote from Monica

Chandler: Okay, so this isn't a picture of our first kiss but it is a picture of my first kiss with this lady. Which, by the look on your face, I'm sure you'll remember, so we don't need this. There's no need- How about I take the real pictures to get developed now?
Monica: That'd be a good idea.
Chandler: You opened all the presents without me? I thought we were supposed to do that together.
Monica: You kissed another woman?
Chandler: Call it even?
Monica: Okay. [Monica and Chandler high-five]

Quote from Ross

Ross: Well, I'm going to go put these in some water.
Phoebe: You stole those from these people's wedding?
Ross: No, no. I took them from the hotel lobby. They think they can charge me for some dirty movie and a bag of Mashuga nuts, they got another thing coming.

Quote from Joey

Ross: Hey, my sweater. I've been looking for this for like a month.
Monica and Phoebe: Oh, my God!
[after a long pause]
Joey: Oh, my God!

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