‘The One with the Proposal (Part 2)’
Season 6, Episode 25 - Aired May 18, 2000
After Chandler's plan to propose to Monica at a restaurant was foiled, he pretends not to be interested in marriage to throw Monica off the scent. Meanwhile, Phoebe and Rachel discuss "back-up plans" if they're not married by the time they're forty.
Quote from Rachel
Joey: Hey, have you guys seen Chandler?
Rachel: No. But you know who did stop in here looking for you? Tenille.
Quote from Chandler
Monica: So that marriage stuff you were saying yesterday? You don't really believe that, do you?
Chandler: Sure, I do. In fact, I think the whole concept of marriage is unnatural. I mean, look at pigs. Let's take a second here and look at pigs. Okay. Pigs don't mate for life. I mean, a pig can have like 1 00 sexual partners in a lifetime. And that's just an ordinary pig, not even a pig that's good at sports.
Quote from Phoebe
Rachel: We're gonna find love.
Phoebe: Definitely.
Rachel: Yeah, I'm pretty confident about that. That's what makes it so easy to be eighty percent happy for Monica and Chandler. Would be nice to have a little guarantee, though.
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Rachel: Well, you know, some people make deals with a friend. Like if neither of them are married by 40, they marry each other.
Phoebe: You mean a backup?
Rachel: Yeah, exactly.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah. I've got that.
Rachel: You do? Who?
Phoebe: Joey.
Rachel: Joey?
Phoebe: Yeah.
Rachel: Are you serious?
Phoebe: Yeah, I locked him in years ago.
Rachel: Wait. So if neither of you are married by the time you're forty, you're going marry Joey?
Phoebe: Yep. We shook on it. But believe me, that is not how he wanted to seal the deal.
Rachel: Oh, seriously?
Phoebe: I think his exact words were [click click purr].
Rachel: Charming.
Phoebe: Well, he's just a backup.
Quote from Ross
Rachel: I'm so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
Ross: Thanks. Yeah, I really thought we'd be able to make it work. I guess it just wasn't meant to be.
Rachel: Yeah. Love. It's a tricky business, isn't it?
Ross: I guess so.
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time we're forty, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, we've already slept together, so you know there'll be no surprises there, you know what I mean. No, like, "What's that?"
Ross: Oh, you want me to be your backup.
Rachel: Exactly.
Ross: Yeah. I already have one.
Rachel: What? Who?
Ross: Phoebe.
Rachel: Phoebe? Wait a minute. But she just said Joey is her backup.
Ross: Oh, I don't think so.
Rachel: Ross, I just had a conversation with her and she said that she and Joey made a deal.
Ross: That's impossible. I mean, we have had a deal for years. We shook on it. Although, believe me, she wanted to do a lot more than that.
Quote from Joey
Joey: Where the hell have you been?
Chandler: I was making a coconut phone with the Professor.
Joey: Richard told Monica he wants to marry her.
Chandler: What?
Joey: Yeah, yeah. I've been trying to find you to tell you to stop messing with her. And maybe I would have if these damn boat shoes wouldn't keep flying off!
Quote from Joey
Chandler: He's not supposed to ask her to marry him. I'm supposed to do that.
Joey: I know.
Chandler: What--? You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to go over there. I'm going to kick his ass. Will you help me?
Joey: Look, Chandler, I don't think us getting our asses kicked is a solution.
Quote from Phoebe
Rachel: Phoebe, you picked Joey and Ross? You can not have two backups.
Phoebe: Of course I can. It's just good sense to back up your backup. Look, I've already lost Chandler.
Rachel: What?
Quote from Phoebe
Joey: Hey, Phoebe! We're both backups?
Ross: Phoebe, how could you do this to me?
Phoebe: Look, I don't know what you are complaining about now? You were both aware of the situation.
Ross: I was not.
Joey: No, we weren't.
Phoebe: Okay, this kind of back talk is not gonna fly when we're married.
Quote from Ross
Rachel: Phoebe, you can't have both of them. You have to pick one.
Joey: Pick me.
Ross: No, pick me. I don't want to end up an old maid.