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The One with the Embyros

‘The One with the Embyros’

Season 4, Episode 12 -  Aired January 15, 1998

After Chandler and Joey claim to know Monica and Rachel better than they know the guys, Ross devises a trivia contest which escalates into a high-stakes battle for the girls' apartment. Meanwhile, Phoebe heads to the fertility clinic to try help Frank and Alice with their dream of being parents.

Quote from Monica

Ross: "Joey had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?"
Monica: Maurice.
Ross: "His profession was?"
Rachel: Space cowboy!
Ross: "What is Chandler Bing's job?" [silence]
Rachel: Oh, gosh, it has something to do with numbers.
Monica: And processing.
Rachel: He carries a briefcase.
Ross: Ten seconds. You need this or you lose the game.
Monica: It has something to do with transponding.
Rachel: Oh, oh! He's a transpon- transponster.
Monica: That's not even a word! *beep*
Monica & Rachel: Noooooooo!

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Quote from Chandler

Ross: "According to Chandler, what phenomenon scares the bejesus out of him?"
Monica: Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance.
Ross: That is correct.
Joey: The lrish jig guy?
Chandler: His legs flail about as if independent from his body!

Quote from Chandler

Monica: Look, I hate this as much as you, but if it makes you feel any better this is all your fault.
Rachel: What?
Monica: Chanandler Bong. Come on, we steal that TV Guide every week.
Chandler: I knew it!

Quote from Chandler

Rachel: [rooster crows] What the hell is that?! What the hell is that? Is that you? [groans]
Monica: Boy, you are really not a morning person.
Rachel: Just back off! [pounding on Chandler and Joey's apartment door] Get up! Get up! Get up! What is that noise?
Chandler: You.
Joey: It's the chick. She's going through some changes.
Monica: What kind of changes?
Chandler: The vet seems to think she's becoming a rooster. [rooster crows] We're getting a second opinion.

Quote from Chandler

Rachel: We'll take "Literature."
Ross: "Every week the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joey's apartment. What name appears on the address label?"
Rachel: Chandler gets it. It's Chandler Bing.
Monica: No!
Ross: I'm afraid the TV Guide comes to "Chanandler Bong."
Monica: I knew that. Rachel, use your head.
Chandler: Actually, it's Ms. Chanandler Bong.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: You guys, you're going to have a baby. They're going to have a baby!
Frank: My sister's going to have my baby!

Quote from Rachel

Ross: Hey, what are you doing shopping at 8 in the morning?
Rachel: Well, I've been up since 6 thanks to somebody's dumb-ass rooster.
Phoebe: You guys, you really should get rid of those animals. They shouldn't be living in an apartment.
Rachel: Yeah, especially not with all these knives and cookbooks around.

Quote from Chandler

Rachel: I'm so not impressed. Everybody snacks when they shop.
Joey: Oh, yeah? Ross, how many items left in that bag?
Ross: Five.
Chandler: Okay, 10 bucks says we can name every item in that bag.
Rachel: How many guesses do you get?
Joey: Six.
Ross: Challenge extended.
Monica: Deal.
Ross: Challenge accepted.
Joey: All right, we'll start with apples.
Ross: We'll be starting with apples.
Chandler: Stop that now.
Ross: Yes.
Joey: Okay. Tortilla chips. Yogurt.
Chandler: Diet soda.
Ross: Yes. Yes. Yes.
Chandler: Orange juice.
Rachel: Oh, there's no orange juice in there. We win!
Ross: They have another guess.
Rachel: Well, we won that one.
Joey: Okay. The last thing is-
Chandler: Ooh, ooh, ooh.
Joey: No. Not for like another two weeks.
Chandler: I got it. Scotch tape.
Ross: How did you know she would buy Scotch tape?
Chandler: Well we used up theirs last night making scary faces.

Quote from Joey

Ross: Gentlemen, you're up first. You have 30 seconds. The lightning round begins - Stop it! - Now.
"What was Monica's nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?"
Joey: Big Fat Goalie.
Ross: Correct! "Rachel claims this is her favorite movie."
Chandler: Dangerous Liaisons.
Ross: "Her actual favorite movie is?"
Joey: Weekend at Bernie's.
Ross: Correct. "In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14?"
Chandler: Oh! [whispers in Ross's ear]
Ross: Ew! No! Her ear. All right, "Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there?"
Joey: Everyday use.
Chandler: Fancy.
Joey: Guest.
Chandler: Fancy guest.
Ross: Two seconds.
Joey: Uh, eleven?
Ross: Unbelievable. Eleven is correct.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Are you in there, little fetus? In nine months will you come greet us? I will buy you some Adidas.

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