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‘The One with the Bullies’ Quotes Page 1 of 5    

Friends: The One with the Bullies

221. The One with the Bullies

Aired April 25, 1996

Chandler and Ross are bullied by two guys at the coffeehouse. Meanwhile, Monica starts investing in the stock market, and Phoebe decides to visit her birth father.

Quote from Joey

Monica: I want to buy five shares of SGJ and I wanna buy them now. Come on, time is money, my friend. Thank you. Whoo!
Rachel: "Time is money, my friend?"
Joey: Yeah, you missed "Takes money to make money" and "Don't make me come down there and kick your Wall Street butt."


Quote from Joey

Joey: It's a woman.
Phoebe: So talk to her.
Joey: [in deep voice] Hello, Mrs. Buffay. I know where your dog is. I want you to know he'll be returned to you, almost as good as new, within 24 hours. Goodbye.
Rachel: Why the voice?
Joey: [in deep voice] Hard to say.

Quote from Joey

Rachel: How did you make $17?
Monica: Well, my financially challenged friends I split my money and I bought some shares of CHP and ZXY.
Joey: How come those?
Monica: Well, CHP because I used to have a crush on Erik Estrada. And ZXY because I think it sounds "zexy."
Rachel: What happened to MEG?
Monica: MEG was good for me, but I dumped her. My motto is, "Get out before they go down."
Joey: That is so not my motto.

Quote from Monica

Joey: Hey, Monica, why are we watching the Business Channel?
Monica: Because I was going by it the other day and I saw there was a stock with my initials, MEG, on it. Sometimes you have to watch for two or three hours before it comes up again, but when it does, it's exciting.
Rachel: Okay, honey, you really need a job.

Quote from Phoebe

Monica: Dad says he knows someone you can call for an interview.
Phoebe: Okay, right there. That's the third sign today. Right there.
Ross: On behalf of everyone, I'd just like to say, "Huh?"
Phoebe: No, because you just said "dad." And everywhere I go today I keep getting signs telling me to go see my father. Like when I was walking over here and I passed a buffet, which is my father's last name. And they were serving franks which is his first name minus the "s" at the end. And there was a rotisserie with a spinning chicken.
Monica: His lndian name?
Phoebe: No. Because I chickened out the last time when I tried to meet him. So coincidences? I don't think so.

Quote from Phoebe

Rachel: Who wants the last hamburger?
Phoebe: Okay, that's it. Now I have to go see him.
Monica: Why?
Phoebe: Hamburger? McDonald's? Old McDonald had a farm. My dad is a pharmacist.
Chandler: And E-I-E-I-O is what your mom said when your dad left her.
Phoebe: Yes!
Chandler: Really?
Phoebe: No.

Quote from Chandler

Chandler: Man, I am so beat. You wanna forget racquetball and just hang out?
Ross: Yeah, all right.
Carl: Hey, you're in our seats.
Ross: Oh. Sorry, we didn't know.
Arthur: Hey, we were sitting there.
Chandler: Okay. There is one more way to say it. Who knows it?
Arthur: Was that supposed to be funny?
Chandler: No, actually, I was just going for colorful.

Quote from Monica

Rachel: Hey, how'd the interview go?
Monica: It bit. It was a '50s theme restaurant. I'd have to cook in a costume and dance on the counter. I mean, I was a sous chef at Cafe des Artistes. How can I take a job where I have to make something called Laverne-and-Curly Fries?

Quote from Joey

Rachel: Well don't do it.
Monica: How can I not do it? I have $127 in the bank.
Joey: Monica, relax. Go get a beer.
Monica: I don't want a beer.
Joey: Who said it was for you?

Quote from Ross

[Chandler and Ross arrive at the apartment after being bullied]
Chandler and Ross: [sullenly] Hi.

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