‘The One with the Ballroom Dancing’
Season 4, Episode 4 - Aired October 16, 1997
When Joey confronts Mr. Treeger for making Rachel cry, he threatens to evict Monica and Rachel unless Joey teaches him to dance. Meanwhile, Chandler calls on Ross for backup when he decides to quit the gym, and Phoebe struggles to resist temptation when she massages an attractive man.
Quote from Monica
Rachel: You got us evicted?
Monica: I told you not to go down there.
Joey: He made Rachel cry.
Monica: Rachel always cries!
Rachel: [sobbing] That's not true.
Quote from Phoebe
Interviewee: So it looks like you've got great experience here. Let's see. Reason for leaving last job?
Phoebe: Yeah, they thought I was a whore.
Interviewee: Okay. We'll give you a call if anything comes up.
Phoebe: Great. Thank you very much.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: Hey, Mr. Treeger.
Mr. Treeger: What are you doing?
Rachel: I'm sorry. It's a little old but ... [opens the pizza box she was throwing away]
Mr. Treeger: You're clogging up the chute I just spent a half-hour unclogging.
Rachel: I'm sorry. I don't come in here a lot.
Mr. Treeger: Of course you don't because you're a little princess. Daddy, buy me a pizza. Daddy, buy me a candy factory. Daddy, make the cast of Cats sing "Happy Birthday" to me. You think you can just come here make a mess and a big man in coveralls will come and clean it up? Well, why don't you think of someone else for a change?
Rachel: [sobbing] Okay, I'm sorry.
[Rachel returns to the apartment with the pizza box]
Monica: God, if you're going to cry about it!
Quote from Rachel
Monica: Rachel, you just put an empty carton back in the fridge.
Rachel: Yeah, I know, but the garbage was full.
Monica: Have you ever taken out the trash?
Rachel: Well, I thought you liked doing it.
Quote from Rachel
Joey: Whoa. Whoa. Treeger made you cry?
Rachel: Yeah. He said really mean things that were only partly true.
Quote from Chandler
Ross: So why don't you quit?
Chandler: You don't think I've tried? You think I like having $50 a month taken out of my bank account every month? They make you go all the way down there. They use all these phrases and peppiness to confuse you. And then they bring out Maria.
Ross: Who is Maria?
Chandler: Oh, Maria! You can't say no to her. She's like this lycra, spandex-covered, gym treat.
Ross: Do you need me to go with you and hold your hand?
Chandler: No.
Ross: So you're strong enough to face her alone?
Chandler: Oh, no. You'll have to come.
Quote from Joey
Joey: You made my friend Rachel cry. So you'll go and apologize to her unless you want me to call the landlord.
Mr. Treeger: And tell him what?
Joey: Maybe you haven't heard of "not making girls cry."
Mr. Treeger: Maybe you haven't heard of the Rent Stabilization Act of 1968.
Joey: I have actually not heard of that.
Quote from Phoebe
Phoebe: Somebody tell me I don't have to work today.
Monica: Why, what's the matter?
Phoebe: My first massage is this incredibly gorgeous guy. Every time I see him, I want to do things to him I can't charge for.
Monica: So do them for free.
Phoebe: Oh, no. It is forbidden. Mrs. Potter fires people for messing around with clients. And it's against my oath as a masseuse.
Ross: They make you take an oath?
Phoebe: No, I made myself take one. Yeah, no fooling around with clients and always be prepared. That one's actually from the Boy Scouts, but it just makes good sense.
Quote from Phoebe
Chandler: Why don't you just give him to someone else?
Phoebe: No, I can handle it. I'm a professional.
Rachel: Oh, Pheebs, is that a new ankle bracelet?
Monica: Oh, and you got a pedicure. Your feet are all dressed up.
Chandler: Because that's the only part he can see when he's on the table.
Monica: You're going to do some feet flirting!
Phoebe: I don't know what you're talking about.
Ross: Then how do you explain the toe ring?
Phoebe: Because it's Arabian Princess Day at work, okay? Leave me alone!