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‘The One with Ross's Sandwich’ Quotes Page 1 of 5    

Friends: The One with Ross's Sandwich

509. The One with Ross's Sandwich

Aired December 10, 1998

After somebody at Ross's work eats his Thanksgiving leftover sandwich, he turns to Phoebe for advice on how to appear threatening. Meanwhile, Phoebe regrets inviting Rachel to a literature class when she doesn't bother to read the book, and Joey gets fed up of covering for Chandler and Monica.

Quote from Ross

Donald: We want you to speak to a psychiatrist.
Ross: Oh, no. Uh, you don't understand. Uh, this is so silly. This is all just because of a sandwich.
Donald: A sandwich?
Ross: Yeah. You see, my sister makes these amazing turkey sandwiches. Her secret is, she puts an extra slice of gravy-soaked bread in the middle. I call it "The Moistmaker." Anyway, I put my sandwich in the fridge and-
Donald: Oh, you know what? I'm sorry. I believe I ate that.
Ross: You ate my sandwich?
Donald: It was a simple mistake. It can happen to anyone.
Ross: Oh- Oh, really? Did you confuse it with your own turkey sandwich with a Moistmaker?
Donald: No, I-
Ross: Do you, perhaps, remember seeing a note on top of it?
Donald: There may have been a joke or limerick of some kind.
Ross: That said it was my sandwich!
Donald: Now, now, calm down. Look in my office. Some of it may still be in the trash.
Ross: What?
Donald: Well, it was quite large. I had to throw most of it away.
Ross: You threw my sandwich away? My sandwich?! My sandwich?!

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Quote from Phoebe

Teacher: What do you think? Uh, you in the blue shirt?
Phoebe: I think that yours is a question with many possible answers.
Teacher: Would you care to venture one?
Phoebe: Would you care to venture one?
Teacher: Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
Phoebe: Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
Teacher: All right. Let's move on.
Phoebe: Okay, then.

Quote from Rachel

Teacher: Sorry I'm late. Let's get started. So, what did you think of Jane Eyre?
Phoebe: Rachel and I were discussing it, and she actually had some very interesting insights.
Teacher: Well, go ahead, Rachel.
Rachel: Um, thank you, Phoebe. What struck me most when reading Jane Eyre was how the book was so ahead of its time.
Teacher: If you're talking about feminism, I think you're right.
Rachel: Well, feminism, yes. But also the robots.

Quote from Ross

Ross: My Thanksgiving leftover sandwich. I can't believe someone just ate it.
Chandler: Ross, it's just a sandwich.
Ross: Just a sandwich? Look, I am 30 years old, okay? I'm going to be divorced twice and I just got evicted. That sandwich was the only good thing going on in my life. Someone ate the only good thing going on in my life!

Quote from Joey

Joey: Well, I think we've all learned something about who's disgusting and who's not. Eh? All right. Now, I'm going to get back to my bucket. I'm only eating the skin, so the chicken's up for grabs.

Quote from Ross

Ross: Unbelievable. I mean, you really kept Joey's underwear? Why? Why would you do that?

Quote from Monica

Monica: I know! I know! I know!
Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.

Quote from Monica

Monica: Hey, everybody. Everybody, guess what. I just convinced Carl to give us a test. Test? Come on. Tests make us all better learners. Oh, yeah. We should have essay questions!

Quote from Joey

Phoebe: Oh, ew, undies!
Rachel: All right. Whose are they? Whose are they?
Ross: Not mine.
Chandler: Well, they're Joey's. They got to be Joey's.
Joey: Yeah, they're mine.
Chandler: See, Joey's. They're Joe-Joe-Joey's.
Ross: Why are they here?
Joey: I don't know. I'm Joey. Yeah, I'm disgusting. I take my underwear off in other people's homes.
Rachel: Well, get them out of here. What's wrong with you?
Chandler: Yeah.
Monica: Yeah.
Rachel: Take them!
Joey: I got them.
Rachel: Joey, you can touch them. They're your underwear.
Joey: Chandler? A word?

Quote from Joey

Joey: That's it. I'm tired of covering for you two. This has got to stop. Argh! And tighty-whiteys? What are you, 8?

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