Phoebe: Who the hell are all these people?
Rachel: I don't know. I called everybody in Monica's phone book and these are the only ones that could show up on 24 hours' notice.
Phoebe: You know, there's another word for people like that: Losers.

Rachel: Hi, I'm Rachel. This is Phoebe. I'm the maid of honor. How do you know Monica?
The Accountant: I was her accountant four years ago.
Rachel: Oh.
The Accountant: I'm very interested to find out who's been doing her taxes the last four years.
Rachel: That's great.

Monica: Okay, we have a lot of options here. A number of prototypes for you to try on.
Joey: Wow. Those look great.
Monica: Yeah. Okay, this one's a mushroom cap. This one is made of bologna.
Joey: And the toothpicks?
Monica: Just until the glue dries.
Joey: Thank God.

Monica: Now, these are more realistic, but perishable. Okay. Over here, we have pink suede, which is nice. But if it gets wet, you know, it's going to shrink.
Joey: Maybe we'll just take that one away.

Monica: I also did a little something in fur, but that's really just for me.

Joey: Ow!
Monica: The toothpick?
Joey: Yeah.
Monica: What are you trying now?
Joey: The Fruit Roll-up.
Monica: And?
Joey: Delicious.
Monica: Joey!

Joey: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. We have a winner.
Monica: What? Which one?
Joey: The Silly Putty. Not so silly anymore.

Joey: So, there you go. That's me. One hundred-percent natural. I tell you, that has never happened before.

Chandler: Well, we're in luck. The tux fits perfectly.
Monica: Chandler, that jacket is way too big.
Chandler: Oh, that's okay because the pants are way too small. Monica I'm sorry, sweetie. You cannot wear that.
Chandler: This means that Ross will be the only cool one. Something, by the way, I never thought I would say.

Joey: Dude, take that thing off. You look like a fool. Now, come next door with me. I got some headdresses I want you to take a look at.