Ross: Chandler, can I just say something? I know you're still mad at me. I just wanna say there were two people there that night. There were two sets of Iips.
Chandler: Yes, well, I expect this from her. She's always been a Freudian nightmare.
Ross: Okay, but if she always behaves like this, why don't you say something then?
Chandler: Because it's complicated. It's complex. Hey, you kissed my mom.
Ross: [to the bystanders] We're rehearsing a Greek play.

Joey: I don't hear anything. Wait.
Ross: What do you see?
Joey: It's hard to tell. They're tiny and upside down. Wait, wait, wait. They're walking away. They're walking away. No, they're not. They're coming right at us. Run, run!

Chandler: So I told her.
Ross: How did it go?
Chandler: Awful. Awful. Couldn't have gone worse.
Ross: Well, how do you feel?
Chandler: Pretty good. I told her.
Ross: Well, see? So maybe it wasn't such a bad idea, you know, me kissing your mom, huh? But we don't have to go down that road.

Nora Bing: [on TV]I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate. But I get to see my son, who I love.
Chandler: This is the way that I find out. Most moms use the phone.

Nora Bing: Anything you want from Lisbon?
Chandler: No, no. Just knowing you're there is enough.

Monica: Phoebe, don't Iook now. But behind you there's a guy who has the potential to break our hearts and plunge us into depression.

Monica: Why did I whoo-hoo? I mean, what was I hoping would happen? That he'd turn around and say "Ooh, I Iove that sound. I must have you now"?

Chandler: You know, we don't have to watch this. Weekend at Bernie's is on Showtime, HBO and Cinemax.

Rachel: I gotta tell you, I Iove your mom's books. I can't get on a plane without one. This is so cool.
Chandler: Yeah, well, you wouldn't think it's so cool if you were 1 1-years-old and all your friends were passing around page 79 of "Mistress Bitch".

Chandler: Hey.
Ross: You mean that?
Chandler: Yeah, why not? [Chandler and Ross shake hands]