Ross: I've got to go pick up Ben. We've got a play date this afternoon.
Rachel: Oh. With who?
Ross: Just this woman I met last night at the party.
Rachel: There was a woman at-? The stripper?
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: You have a play date with a stripper?
Chandler: Man, I got to get a kid.

Ross: We started talking after she, you know, did her thing, and it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age. So we're going to take the kids to a Gymboree class. Is that okay?
Rachel: Sure. Is she married?
Ross: Uh, no.
Rachel: Huh.
Ross: Are you jealous?
Rachel: No. You know, I just don't see why she has to play with you, that's all. I mean, doesn't she, you know, have any other stripper mom friends of her own?

Rachel: Well, there's a kiss he won't forget for a few hours, you know?
Chandler: Yeah. Either that, or you just turned him on and sent him off to a stripper.

Barbershop Quartet: [singing] Congratulations On your first week At your brand new job It won't be long Before you're the boss [scatting] And you know who will be there To support you Your one and only boyfriend It's nice to have a boyfriend Mm-mmm Your loyal, loving boyfriend, Ross.
Ross!

Monica: Are you enjoying it?
Julio: I thought that I would, but the translation's no good.
Monica: You're a poet and you don't know it.

Rachel: So did you have fun at the bachelor party last night?
Chandler: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Look what I got. See? She's fully dressed, right?
Rachel: Right.
Chandler: And then you click it and, uh-oh, she's naked. And then you click it again and she's dressed. She's a business woman. She's walking down the street. She's window shopping, and, oh, oh, oh, she's naked.

Rachel: Tell him.
Ross: It's her first day at this new job. You're not supposed to start with her.
Chandler: All right. I suppose I can wait a day.

Chandler: "Three years of modern dance with Twyla Tharp? Five years with the American Ballet Theatre?"
Joey: Hey, everybody lies on their resume, okay? I wasn't one of the Zoom kids either.