Monica: I didn't think you could keep it a secret.
Chandler: [high-pitched voice:] What? [normal voice:] I am an excellent secret-keeper. I have kept all our secrets.
Joey: What secrets?
Chandler: No, no, Joey. I'm not gonna tell you because I am an excellent secret-keeper.
Joey: Psst. You'll tell me later?
Chandler: You already know.

Phoebe: It's so romantic to send people off on their honeymoon.
Joey: You know, Monica and Chandler are married. Ross and Rachel are having a baby. Maybe you and I should do something.
Phoebe: All in good time, my love. All in good time.

Joey: Why would they take our keys?
Phoebe: Maybe they don't trust us.
Joey: No, that's not it. They let me keep my key the last time they were out of town.
Phoebe: You mean the time you broke the ketchup bottle and cleaned it up with Monica's guest towels?
Joey: Hey, I washed those.
Phoebe: No, you didn't.
Joey: Yeah, that didn't sound like me.

Joey: Mr. Treeger? I need to get into Monica's apartment. It's an emergency! Uh, gas leak. Oh, and bring garlic bread.

Ross: I think I might know what this is about.
Joey: Really?
Ross: Yeah. We promised we weren't gonna tell anybody this, but a month ago, Rachel and I slept together.
Phoebe: And?
Ross: Wow, I thought you'd be a little more shocked.
Phoebe: Oh, sorry. And?!

Ross: Well, we said we'd just do it that one time but now I think she may wanna start things up again.
Joey: Yeah, I don't think that's what it is.
Ross: Why? What else could it be?
Joey: Oh, wow, I don't feel well.
Ross: I'm telling you, that's what it is. No wonder she was looking at me funny at the wedding. She didn't say anything to you?
Phoebe: [to Joey] Maybe it's something you ate.

Monica: Did you hear that? They bumped them up to first class because it's their honeymoon. Come on, let's act like we're on our honeymoon.
Chandler: We are on our honeymoon.
Monica: Grab my ass.

Monica: See, if we'd gone around them like I said, she would have given us those tickets. Damn it.
Chandler: 25 J and K, any chance those aren't together?

Chandler: Just act like you belong.
Monica: Oh, my God! Oranges!
Airline Employee: Sir, may I see your tickets, please?
Chandler: Yes, of course.
Airline Employee: I'm sorry. Would you move your thumb? I can't see the seat number.
Chandler: Oh, that's all right. I have it memorized. It's 1 A.
Airline Employee: Sir, this is not a first class ticket. I'm sorry.
Chandler: Apology accepted. Excuse us.
Airline Employee: Sir, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Monica: Fine. [Monica grabs an orange] Go, go, go!

Ross: Ross and Rachel. Rachel and Ross. It's been one heck of a seesaw, hasn't it?
Rachel: What?
Ross: I mean, look, that one night we had was fun and certainly passionate. But don't you think maybe it's better if we just stay friends?
Rachel: Seriously, what?
Ross: Okay, okay. You know what? If you want to, we can do it one more time. I'd be okay with that. In fact, I have some time right now.