Chandler: Now, how's that going? Are you okay with the not-flirting thing?
Joey: Yeah, so far. But it's tough. I've got all this built-up flirting energy, and I don't know how to get rid of it. [to Monica] How you doin'?

Ross: Wow. Couples who live together do start to look alike. So, Mondler. Uh, what are you doing?
Chandler: What does it look like? I am cleaning.

Chandler: She is not going to care if I put her stuff back in the same stupid place.
Ross: Hello? Did you just meet Monica?

Ross: Look, Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind of stuff, all right? Believe me, I lived with her for sixteen years. She is going to freak out. Oh, my God. She's going to sit on you.

Chandler: You know what we should do? We should start with the big stuff. You know, that'll be the easiest. Let's start with the couch. [Chandler lifts the couch up] I got it.
Ross: Yeah, that doesn't look right.
Chandler: What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. Then I can just walk over here and casually put my feet right up on... Okay, here's what we do. We just move the couch closer to the coffee table.
Ross: But then the back of the couch won't line up with back of the carpet.
Chandler: Okay. Well, here. We'll just move the coffee table closer to the couch.
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. But then the coffee table won't be centered in the seating area.
Chandler: [high-pitched voice] Yes, but the coffee table doesn't match the table... Ross!

Joey: Look, I need your help. Okay. I have to do something to repel this woman. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You guys repel women all the time.
Ross: Hey, I've been married three times.
[Chandler slow claps]

Ross: Oh, you know what? Girls don't like it when I start talking about science.
Chandler: That's not specific to girls.
Joey: This is great. This is great. What else? What else?
Ross: Oh, they don't like it when you correct their grammar.
Chandler: And they don't like it when you explain why your jokes are funny.
Ross: You know, they don't like it when you keep asking them if they like you.
Chandler: Man, I am so lucky I have Monica.
Ross: I'm never gonna find love again.

Phoebe: Me, I'm more free, you know? I run like I did when I was a kid, because that's the only way it's fun, you know? I mean, didn't you ever run so fast you thought your legs were going to fall off? You know, like when you were running towards the swings or running away from Satan? The neighbor's dog.

Monica: Why is Ross naked?
Ross: I had to show Chandler something.
Monica: Naked?
Ross: I guess I have a, uh, guy problem.
Monica: Is it the same thing that Chandler had?
Chandler: Look, just come back later. We'll get everything squared away, and you can come back later.
Monica: Okay. Hey, listen, there's still some of Chandler's medicine under the sink in the bathroom. Bye.
Chandler: Bye. Thank God.
Ross: Dude, what'd you have?

Janine: Hey, Joey, I've got some beer for you.
Joey: Don't you mean "for whom"?
Janine: Sure. Listen, I was gonna order some pizza. You wanna share one?
Joey: Pizza? It's not like I never had that before. [mimics drum fill]