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‘The One Where Nana Dies Twice’ Quotes

Friends: The One Where Nana Dies Twice

108. The One Where Nana Dies Twice

Aired November 10, 1994

Ross and Monica go to the hospital when their grandmother is taken ill. Meanwhile, Chandler is surprised when one of his colleagues attempts to set him up with a male co-worker.

Quote from Monica

Judy Geller: No, I'd be hearing about why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham. Or I didn't spend enough on flowers. Or if I'd spent more, she'd say: "Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, l'm dead. "
Monica: That sounds like Nana.
Judy Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
Monica: I can imagine.
Judy Geller: I'm telling you. It's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person she is.
Monica: That is a wonder.

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Quote from Jack Geller

Jack Geller: I was just thinking when my time comes-
Monica: Dad.
Jack Geller: Listen to me. When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Monica: You what?
Jack Geller: I wanna be buried at sea. It looks like fun.
Monica: Define "fun."
Jack Geller: Come on. You'll make a day of it. You'll get a boat, pack a lunch.
Monica: And then we throw your body in the water. Gee, that does sound fun.
Jack Geller: Everyone thinks they know me. Everyone says "Jack Geller, so predictable." Maybe after I'm gone, they'll say, "Buried at sea? Huh."
Monica: That's probably what they'll say.
Jack Geller: I'd like that.

Quote from Chandler

Shelly: Question: You're not dating anyone are you? Because I met somebody who would be perfect for you.
Chandler: You see, perfect might be a problem. Had you said codependent or self-destructive...
Shelly: Do you want a date Saturday?
Chandler: Yes, please.
Shelly: He is cute. He's funny. He's-
Chandler: He's a he?
Shelly: Well, yeah. Oh, God! I just- I thought- You're nice. Oh, God. Good, Shelly. I'm gonna flush myself down the toilet now. Okay. Bye-bye.

Quote from Rachel

Chandler: It's hard to enjoy noodles after that. Is that ridiculous? Can you believe she actually thought that?
Rachel: Um, yeah. Well, I mean, when I first met you, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be.
Chandler: You did?
Rachel: Well, yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts so then I figured maybe not.

Quote from Judy Geller

Monica: How are you, mom?
Judy Geller: Me? I'm fine, fine. I'm glad you're here. What's with your hair?
Monica: What?
Judy Geller: What's different?
Monica: Nothing.
Judy Geller: Oh, maybe that's it.

Quote from Ross

Monica: She's unbelievable. Her mother's-
Ross: Okay, relax. We're gonna be here a while, it seems. And we still have boyfriends and your career to cover.

Quote from Jack Geller

Ross: You know what I love? Her Sweet 'N Lows. How she was always stealing them from restaurants.
Jack Geller: Not just from restaurants, from our house.

Quote from Jack Geller

Aunt Lillian: What's going on?
Jack Geller: She may have died.
Aunt Lillian: She may have died?
Jack Geller: We're looking into it.

Quote from Monica

Joey: You guys okay?
Ross: I don't know. It's weird. I mean, I know she's gone, but I just don't feel-
Phoebe: Maybe that's because she's not really gone.
Ross: Oh, no, she's gone.
Monica: We checked. A lot.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: [giving Rachel her yellow pencil back] Okay, I don't know who this is, but it's not Debbie.

Quote from Judy Geller

Ross: I thought it was going to be a closed casket.
Judy Geller: Well, that doesn't mean she can't look nice.

Quote from Chandler

Shelly: It's a shame. You and Lowell would've made a great couple.
Chandler: Lowell? Financial Services Lowell? That's who you saw me with?
Shelly: What? He's cute.
Chandler: Well, yeah. He's no Brian in Payroll.
Shelly: Is Brian?
Chandler: No, I don't know. Point is, if you were gonna set me up I'd like to think it'd be with somebody like him.
Shelly: Well, I think Brian's a little out of your league.
Chandler: Excuse me. You don't think I could get a Brian? Because I could get a Brian. Believe you me. I'm really not.

Quote from Judy Geller

Monica: lt was a really beautiful service.
Judy Geller: lt really was. Come here, sweetheart. You know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.

Quote from Chandler

Joey: What?
Chandler: Nothing. Nothing. Just that your overcoat sounds remarkably like Brent Musberger.
Joey: Check it out. Giants-Cowboys.
Chandler: You're watching football at a funeral?
Joey: No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception.
Chandler: You are a frightening, frightening man.

Quote from Monica

Judy Geller: Your grandmother would've hated this.
Monica: Well, sure, what with it being her funeral and all.

Quote from Judy Geller

Monica: So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it all over again, I mean, if she was here right now, would you tell her?
Judy Geller: Tell her what?
Monica: How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail. Like your hair, for example.
Judy Geller: I'm not sure I know what you're getting at.
Monica: Do you think things would have been better if you'd just told her the truth?
Judy Geller: No, I think some things are better left unsaid. I think it's nicer when people just get along. More wine, dear?
Monica: Oh, I think so.
Judy Geller: Those earrings look really lovely on you.
Monica: Thank you. They're yours.
Judy Geller: Actually, they were Nana's.

Quote from Ross

Chandler: Did any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me?
Monica: I did.
Phoebe: I think so, yeah.
Joey: Not me.
Ross: No, no, me neither. Although back in college, Susan Saladore did.
Chandler: You're kidding. Did you tell her I wasn't?
Ross: No. It's because I kind of wanted to go out with her too. So I told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman, who also liked her.

Quote from Jack Geller

Monica: Dad, let's just make a decision.
Jack Geller: You're right. This is crazy. It’s just going into the ground. We should just get the most basic thing.
Monica: Great! That would be the non-protective corrugate fiberboard with white laminate. And we can’t bury Nana in dresser drawer from Ikea.
Jack Geller: See, this is why your mother buys all my clothes. I hate to shop. I hate it!
Monica: Dad, don't you think this might be more about the fact that...once you make the decision, it's like acknowledging Nana's actually gone?
Jack Geller: No, I really hate to shop.

Quote from Ross

Judy Geller: What is going on?
Ross: Well, you know how the nurse said Nana had passed? Well, she's not quite.
Judy Geller: What?
Ross: She's not passed! She's present! She's back!

Quote from Chandler

Chandler: Hey, Lowell.
Lowell: Oh, hey, Chandler.
Chandler: So how's it going in Financial Services?
Lowell: It's like Mardi Gras without the papier-mache heads. How about you?
Chandler: Good. Good. Listen, I don't know what Shelly told you about me, but I'm not-
Lowell: I know. That's what I told her.
Chandler: Really?
Lowell: Yeah.
Chandler: So you can tell?
Lowell: Pretty much. Most of the time. We have a kind of radar.
Chandler: So you don't think I have a quality?
Lowell: Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no. By the way, your friend Brian, from Payroll? He is.
Chandler: He is?
Lowell: And way out of your league.
Chandler: Out of my league! I could get a Brian. If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. Hey, Brian.


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