Ross: But I don't want to be single, okay? I just want to be married again.
[Rachel rushes into Central Perk wearing a wedding dress]
Chandler: And I just want a million dollars!

Monica: You want to tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?
Rachel: Oh, God, well, it started about a half-hour before the wedding. I was in this room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this really gorgeous Limoges gravy boat. When all of a sudden - Sweet 'N Low? - I realized I was more turned on by this gravy boat than Barry. And then I got really freaked out and that's when it hit me: How much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. You know, I mean, I always knew he looked familiar, but-

Ross: You know what's scary? What if there's only one woman for everybody? I mean, what if you get one woman, and that's it? Unfortunately, in my case, there was only one woman for her.

Joey: What are you talking about? One woman. That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream. Let me tell you something. There's lots of flavors out there. There's rocky road and cookie dough and, bing, cherry vanilla. You can get 'em with jimmies or nuts or whipped cream. This is the best thing to happen to you! You got married. You were like, what, 8? Welcome back to the world. Grab a spoon!

Ross: I honestly don't know if I'm hungry or horny.
Chandler: Then stay out of my freezer.

Rachel: Come on, Daddy, listen to me! It's like all of my life, everyone has always told me, "You're a shoe!" "You're a shoe!" "You're a shoe!" And then today I just stopped and said, What if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I want to be a purse? Or a hat? No, I don't want you to buy me a hat! I'm saying that I am a hat. It's a metaphor, Daddy!
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.

Chandler: Alright, so I'm back in high school, standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I'm totally naked.
Phoebe: I've had that dream.
Chandler: Then I look down and I realize there is a phone ... there.
Joey: Instead of?
Chandler: That's right!
Joey: Never had that one.
Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. And it turns out it's my mother. Which is very, very weird because she never calls me.

Ross: This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can. I should have known.

Chandler: All right, kids, I've got to get to work. If I don't input those numbers, it doesn't make much of a difference.

Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.
Chandler: Sounds like a date to me.