Nurse: Miss Green, your father's doctor is on the phone if you'd like to speak to him.
Rachel: Oh, great. Uh, are you gonna be okay?
Ross: He's unconscious, I think we'll be just fine.

Ross: Hey. I was gonna make some dinner but all I found in your dad's fridge was bacon and heavy cream. I think we solved the mystery of heart attack.

Erica: Thanks so much for taking me to all these places, I had a great time.
Monica: Oh, I'm glad. Listen, I want to apologize about Chandler, though. I just did not see this coming.
Chandler: New York is awesome!
Monica: What is with you?
Chandler: You know, I've been to these before but I've never really seen them, you know?
Monica: Yeah, you missed a lot when you were mooing.

Ross: Hi, Rach, can you grab me a cup of coffee?
Rachel: Sure.
Ross: You've been quiet all morning, is everything okay?
Rachel: Mm-hmm.
Ross: You sure you are alright.
Rachel: Yep.
Ross: Okay. Um, well I'm gonna go grab us some breakfast.
Rachel: FYI-
Ross: There it is.
Rachel: In the future, when a girl asks for some ill-advised sympathy sex, just do it.
Ross: Wait, wait, you're mad at me about last night? I was just trying to do the right thing.
Rachel: Really? Well it seems to me if you had done the right thing, I would not have woken up today feeling stupid and embarrassed. I would have woken up feeling comforted and satisfied.
Ross: Well-
Rachel: Oh, stop that.
Ross: I can't believe this. I was just being a good guy. I treated you with respect and understanding.
Rachel: Ahh, that is so hot.

Ross: Hey, I was looking out for you.
Rachel: Oh, really? Well, Ross, you know what? I am a big girl, I don't need someone telling me what is best for me.
Ross: I gotta say I have not had sex a lot times before. This is the worst ever.
Rachel: Oh really, really? Well, it wasn't very good for me, either.
Ross: Oh, okay. You know- Hey. Hey. You know what? To avoid this little thing in the future, let's just say you and me, never having sex again.
Rachel: What?
Ross: That's right. Sex is off the table. I am never having sex with you again. Dr Green, are you feeling better?

Chandler: Hey, how was lunch?
Erica: We had a good time. By the way, I wanted to ask you something. It would really mean a lot to me if the baby was a boy, that you name him after my father Jiminy Billy Bob?
Chandler: Oh, really?
Erica: No! [laughs] You were right, that was fun.

Casting Director: Whenever you're ready, Joey.
Joey: Right. Ahem. "Je boo boo Claude. Ooh les poo la blah bleu."
Actor: I'm sorry, what's going on?
Joey: Dude, come on. French it up.
Casting Director: Joey, do you speak French?
Joey: "Toot des la smore. Bleu, bleu, eh, blah, bloo, foof."
Casting Director: You know what, I think this audition is over.

Phoebe: Okay, can you really tap dance?
Joey: No.
Phoebe: Off the resume. Archery?
Joey: No.
Phoebe: Horseback riding?
Joey: Would fall off a lot.
Phoebe: You can drink a gallon of milk in 10 seconds?
Joey: That I can do.
Phoebe: Come on, you can drink a gallon of milk in 10 seconds?
Joey: All right, watch me. Okay, your time, you ready?
Phoebe: Ready, go. You did it.

Monica: Hey, you guys. I want you to meet someone really special. Phoebe, this is Erica, and this is the baby. Joey, Erica, Baby.
Joey: Hi.
Monica: Everyone. Erica, Baby.
Chandler: Monica, calm, self.

Phoebe: Okay, what are you gonna be doing today?
Erica: Oh, I want to see everything. Time Square, Coney Island, Rockefeller Center-
Joey: Oh, you know what you should do. You should walk all the way to the top of Statue of Liberty.
Erica: Oh yeah, let's do that.
Chandler: Great. This baby better be really good.