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‘The One Where Everybody Finds Out’ Quotes Page 1 of 5    

Friends: The One Where Everybody Finds Out

514. The One Where Everybody Finds Out

Aired February 11, 1999

When the group notice that Ugly Naked Guy is moving out, Ross decides to try get his apartment. As Rachel and Phoebe join Ross on a tour of the apartment, Phoebe is horrified to see Chandler and Monica hooking up across the street. After learning that Rachel and Joey already know about the secret relationship, Phoebe suggests they have some fun at Chandler and Monica's expense.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler. Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! Oh! Oh! Oh! Chandler and Monica! Chandler and Monica!
Rachel: Oh, my God!
Phoebe: Chandler and Monica!
Rachel: Oh, my God!
Phoebe: Oh, my eyes! My eyes!

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Quote from Ross

Ross: A new place for a new Ross. I'm going to have you and all the guys from work over, you know, once it's furnished.
Donald: I must say, it's nice to see you back on your feet.
Ross: Well, I am that. And that whole rage thing is definitely behind me.
Donald: I wonder if it's time for you to rejoin our museum team?
Ross: Oh, Donald, that would be great. I am totally ready to come back to work. I- [looks out the window] What? No! No! What are you doing? Get off my sister!

Quote from Rachel

Rachel: Phoebe, Phoebe. It's okay!
Phoebe: No, they're doing it!
Rachel: I know! I know!
Phoebe: You know?
Rachel: Yes, I know and Joey knows, but Ross doesn't know, so you have to stop screaming!

Quote from Chandler

Chandler: Okay, did you see that? With the inappropriate, and the pinching?
Monica: Actually, I did.
Chandler: So now do you believe that she's attracted to me?
Monica: Oh, my God. Oh, my God. She knows about us.
Chandler: Are you serious?
Monica: Phoebe knows, and she's just trying to freak us out. That's the only explanation for it.
Chandler: Okay, but what about, you know, my pinchable butt and my bulging biceps? [Chandler feels his arm] She knows!

Quote from Chandler

Chandler: Okay, okay, okay. You win. I can't have sex with you.
Phoebe: And why not?
Chandler: Because I'm in love with Monica.
Phoebe: You-re You're what?
Chandler: Love her. That's right. I love her. I love her. I love you, Monica.
Monica: I love you too, Chandler.
Phoebe: I just thought you guys were doing it. I didn't know you were in love!
Joey: Dude!

Quote from Ross

Rachel: Hey, Ross, any word on the apartment yet?
Ross: Well, I called there, and it turns out Naked Guy is subletting it himself and he's already had 100 applicants.
Phoebe: Oh, man.
Ross: No, no, it's okay. I've got the edge. I know it's not exactly ethical, but I sent him a bribe to tip the scales in my direction. Check it out. You can probably see it from the window.
Monica: Is it that pinball machine with the big bow on it?
Ross: No.
Chandler: That new mountain bike?
Ross: No.
Monica: Well, what did you send?
Ross: A basket of mini muffins.
Phoebe: There's a whole table of mini muffin baskets. Which one did you send?
Ross: The small one.

Quote from Rachel

Rachel: You know what you should do? You should find out what his hobbies are and use that to bond with him. Yeah, like if I wanted something from Joey I would strike up a conversation about, say, sandwiches or, uh, my underwear.
Joey: I'm listening.

Quote from Joey

Ross: Hey. If he's moving, maybe I should try to get his place.
Joey: Good idea.
Ross: It would be so cool to live across from you guys.
Joey: Hey, then we could do that telephone thing, you know, where you have a can, we have a can and it's connected by a string.
Chandler: Or we could do the actual telephone thing.

Quote from Joey

Phoebe: You don't have to do anything. Just don't tell them we know.
Joey: No. I can't take anymore secrets. I got your secrets, I got their secrets, I got secrets of my own, you know.
Rachel: You don't have any secrets.
Joey: Oh, yeah? Well, you don't know about Hugsy, my bedtime penguin pal.

Quote from Phoebe

Rachel: How are we going to mess with them?
Phoebe: Well, you could use your position as the roommate. And then I would use the strongest tool at my disposal, my sexuality.

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