Chandler: I'm taking my ex-girlfriend off my speed dialer. No, no, no, no. It's a good thing. Why must we dial so speedily anyway? Why must we rush through life? Why can't we savor the precious moments? Those are some huge breasts you have.

Chandler: It's got to be Veronica. The girl in the red skirt. I definitely stuck my tongue down her throat.
Monica: That was me.
Chandler: Look, when I've been drink, sometimes I get overly friendly and I'm sorry.
Rachel: That's all right.
Ross: That's okay.

[Joey's sisters enter the apartment]
Chandler: Okay. How many of that girl are you seeing?

Ross: "Dear Mary Angela: Hi, how's it going? This is the hardest letter I've ever had to write." What the hell's the matter with you? How do you think Joey's going to react when he finds out you blew off his sister with a letter?
Chandler: That's the part where you tell him that I moved to France when actually I'll be in Cuba.

Ross: Somebody's at the door on the ceiling.
Rachel: That's our unbelievably loud upstairs neighbor.
Monica: Yeah, he took up the carpets, and now you can hear everything.
Phoebe: Why don't you go ask him to just, "Step lightly, please?"
Monica: I have, like five times. But the guy is so charming that I go up there to yell, then I end up apologizing to him.
Phoebe: Oh, that is silly. I'll go up there. I'll tell him to keep it down.

Mr. Kaplan: How's that coffee coming, dear?
Rachel: Right away, Mr. Kaplan.
Mr. Kaplan: I'm not supposed to drink coffee. It makes me gassy.
Rachel: I know.

Ross: So did you tell "Mark Something" about me?
Rachel: I didn't have to because I was wearing my "I Heart Ross" sandwich board and ringing my bell.

Ross: So he's "just a nice guy." Do you really think this Mark doesn't want anything for helping you?
Rachel: Well, I assume I'll have to take showers with him. But, you know, that's true of any job.

Chandler: I fooled around with Joey's sister. [Phoebe gasps] That's not the worst part.
Monica: What is the worst part?
Chandler: I can't remember which sister.
Ross: You see what men do? Don't tell me men are nice. This is men!

Ross: Look, you've got to do this yourself in person. You know her name. You just go to the house and ask for Mary Angela. When whichever one she is comes to the door take her for a walk and let her down easy.
Chandler: What if Mary Angela comes to the door and I ask for her?
Ross: Where in Cuba?