‘The One That Could Have Been (Part 2)’
Season 6, Episode 16 - Aired February 17, 2000
The gang ponders what might have been if Ross and Carol had stayed together, Monica was still heavy, Chandler had become a struggling writer, Joey still worked on Days of our Lives, Rachel had married Barry, and Phoebe had taken a job as a stockbroker.
Quote from Ross
Ross: Look, I don't know what's going on with you and your husband and what is hopefully an adult dog-walker. Look, can I just say, not all men are like that.
Rachel: Ugh.
Ross: Hey, there are men who'll do whatever it takes to make their marriage work. There are some men who will stand by and watch as their wives engage in what can only be described as a "twosome" with some woman she barely knows from the gym.
Rachel: Who are these men?
Ross: Just men. A guy I know.
Rachel: Well, you might want to tell him it sounds like his wife is gay.
Ross: She is not... She's gay. Oh, my God. She is so gay!
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: Is Joey Tribbiani here? If you see him, please tell him I'm looking for him, and that this time I am not gonna throw up.
Quote from Ross
Ross: So, honey, this threesome thing? How are we even gonna start to find-?
Carol: Actually, I've been making a list of all the women I know who might be into doing this.
Ross: Oh, wow. Huh. Boy. Well, someone's been doing their homework.
Carol: Yeah. And I know Gail Rosten is in there twice, but she is so...
Ross: Oh, I know. You know, just talkin' about it is gettin' me kind of...
Carol: Oh, I know. Me too.
Ross: Really? Well, I think Ben's asleep.
Carol: Oh, um... You know, I think it'll be better if we just save it.
Ross: Yeah. Right. Save it. I can do that. [karate chop]
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: I mean, it's just so realistic.
Joey: I know. His name's Pat.
Rachel: Pat the dog. [laughs] Oh. Oh, I get it.
Quote from Monica
Monica: I hope you're hungry. We're starting with oysters. You know what they say about oysters, don't you?
Roger: They have parasites?
Monica: No. Um, well, some people say that oysters are an aphrodisiac.
Roger: What people?
Monica: People. People say it.
Quote from Monica
Roger: Sorry, it's the hospital. The food looks great. Save me some?
Monica: I can't promise anything.
Quote from Ross
[Susan is taking off her coat]
Ross: I'm Ross, by the way.
Susan: Hello, Ross. [Susan hands Ross her coat] I love what you've done with the space.
Carol: Thank you so much. [Carol and Susan go into the bedroom]
Ross: How hot is this?!
Quote from Chandler
Monica: Tonight was going to be my first time.
Chandler: With Roger? Not just with Roger? Oh, my God.
Monica: All right, relax, Mr. I've-Had-Sex-Four-Times.
Chandler: Four different women. I've had sex way more times.
Monica: How many?
Chandler: Nine.
Quote from Joey
Rachel: How do you know where Dr. Drake Ramoray leaves off and Joey Tribbiani begins?
Joey: Well, with Dr. Drake, they always tell me what to say. And with Joey, I pretty much have to make it up on my own.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: If we did do this, there'd be a lot of pressure on me. Because you've waited a long time, and I wouldn't want to disappoint you.
Monica: But I have nothing to compare it to. Even if you were horrible, how would I know?
Chandler: I do like that.
Monica: It's harder for me. I have four women to compete with.
Chandler: Well, if it helps, there were only three.