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‘The One at the Beach’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Friends: The One at the Beach

325. The One at the Beach

Aired May 15, 1997

Phoebe takes the gang with her as she hopes to learn more about her parents from an old family friend who lives in Montauk. When Ross starts to think Rachel might still have feelings for him, he must decide between her and Bonnie.

Quote from Joey

Rachel: Is that woman capable of talking about anything other than sex?
Joey: Yeah, sure. Earlier she was talking about geography.
Monica: Joey ,she was listing the countries she's done it in.
Joey: I think we all learned something.

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Quote from Joey

[Joey is carrying a brown paper bag]
Monica: Oh, good. You bought food.
Joey: No, just my luggage. [pulls out a pair of underpants]

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: I am having the best karma this week. I find this woman who knew my parents and then my client gives me his beach house.
Ross: What about that bike messenger you hit?
Phoebe: Oh, I wasn't talking about his karma.

Quote from Phoebe

Monica: So what's Phoebe like?
Phoebe: I'm kind, caring and sweet. What's Monica like?
Monica: No, the other Phoebe. The one you went to go see.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: She canceled. My namesake canceled on me. She claims she had to go out of town.
She's avoiding me. She doesn't want to tell me where my father is. She knows!
Rachel: Pheebs, that sucks.
Phoebe: Well, don't "Pheebs, that sucks" me yet.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: She's out of town. There's got to be something in her house that tells me where my father is.
Ross: Uh, Pheebs, some people call that "breaking and entering."
Phoebe: Well, are any of those people here?
Monica: No.
Joey: Oh, no, no.
Phoebe: Look, I'll do something nice, okay? I'll fill her ice trays.

Quote from Joey

Chandler: No, I don't care. I'm not playing one-on-one strip poker with you for practice.
Joey: But I made cards.

Quote from Monica

Chandler: Besides, worst comes to worst. I'll be your boyfriend.
Monica: [snickers] Yeah, right.
Chandler: Why is that so funny?
Monica: You made a joke, right? So I laughed.
Chandler: [laughs] A little too hard. What, am I not boyfriend material?
Monica: No, you're Chandler. You know. Chandler!
Chandler: Okay, so we've established my name, and hit me. But, theoretically, say we weren't friends. Say it's a blind date. I show up at your door and I'm, like, "Hey, nice to meet you. Hey. Hey."
Monica: I'd probably be scared of a guy using a fake voice.

Quote from Joey

Phoebe: Hey, you guys. Look what I found. That's my mom's writing. Look.
Chandler: "Me and Frank and Phoebe, graduation, 1965."
Phoebe: Do you know what that means?
Joey: That you're actually 50?

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: No, that's not "me" Phoebe. That's her pal, Phoebe. According to her yearbook, they were BFF. [silence] Best Friends Forever.

Quote from Chandler

Monica: Would you look at them? I'm never gonna find a boyfriend again. I'm gonna die an old maid.
Chandler: You're not gonna die an old maid. Maybe an old spinster cook.

Quote from Chandler

Joey: Hey, check out the hat.
Chandler: Wait a minute, I know that hat. I was taken aboard that hat. They did experiments on me. I can't have children.

Quote from Chandler

Monica: Seriously, where did you get the hat?
Rachel: Ross gave it to me.
Ross: Aw, I think she looks good.
Rachel: Thank you.
Chandler: Did he buy it for you or win it for you?

Quote from Phoebe

Rachel: Excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I'm here to tell you hats are back.
Phoebe: And this time, they've ganged up and formed one giant super-hat.

Quote from Ross

Monica: What's with all this sand?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. Bob said there might be flood damage.
Ross: Either that or he has a really big cat.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe Abbott: Oh, well, you know, we were always together. The other kids had a nickname for us.
Phoebe: What was it?
Phoebe Abbott: The Three Losers.

Quote from Joey

Joey: You know what a really good rainy-day game is?
Monica: What?
Joey: I mean, naked game. We should totally play strip poker.

Quote from Joey

Monica: Strip Happy Days Game?
Joey: Well, I couldn't find cards, so it was either this or Strip Bag-Of-Old-Knitting-Stuff.

Quote from Phoebe

Ross: "Fonzie gives you two thumbs up. Collect two cool points."
Phoebe: Mon, when you get five points, you get to make someone take off one item of clothing.
It hasn't happened yet, but we're very excited.

Quote from Ross

Ross: [rolling dice] Okay, come on. Daddy needs a new pair of electromagnetic microscopes for the Prehistoric Forensics Department.

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