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‘The One After Vegas’ Quotes Page 1 of 5

Friends: The One After Vegas

601. The One After Vegas

Aired September 23, 1999

The events of their drunken night in Vegas slowly come back to Ross and Rachel. Meanwhile, Phoebe and Joey drive back to New York in her cab, and Monica and Chandler consider taking a step forward in their relationship.

Quote from Joey

Joey: Where is the waitress? I'm starving.
Chandler: It's a buffet, man.
Joey: Oh, here's where I win all my money back!

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Quote from Rachel

Rachel: The bottom line, Ross, is we cannot stay married.
Ross: I don't know if that's true.
Rachel: Oh, but it is.
Ross: Okay. You know what this is? This is a difference of opinion. And when that happens in a marriage-
Rachel: Oh, Ross, come on. This is not a marriage. This is the world's worst hangover!

Quote from Rachel

Rachel: Ross, listen, if you do not get this annulment, I will.
Ross: All right. All right, I'll do it.
Ross: Thank you.
Rachel: Hey. Hey, is there any such thing as an annulment shower?

Quote from Joey

Ross: Laugh it up, but the joke's on you because we don't need to get divorced. Okay, we're just gonna get an annulment.
Joey: An annulment? Ross, I don't think surgery is the answer here.

Quote from Chandler

Monica: What are you guys gonna do?
Rachel: Well, I guess we find a divorce lawyer.
Chandler: Well, I think, I think Ross already has one. Now, this one's free, right? Because you paid for the first two, so you get the third one for free.

Quote from Chandler

Ross: Hello, Mrs. Ross.
Rachel: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel.
Monica: Whoa!
Chandler: Oh, my God!
Joey: Come on, Pheebs, hurry. Hurry, hurry, hurry.
Phoebe: Okay. Okay.
Chandler: Oh, my God. ls everybody getting married?

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: Hey.
Monica: What are you guys doing here?
Joey: Ross and Rachel left us a message saying they were getting married. Isn't that why you guys are here?
Chandler: Yes.
Monica: Why else would we be here?
Joey: Well, what happened? Did we miss it?
Chandler: We actually missed it.
Phoebe: Maybe you wouldn't have if you could run in the chapel!

Quote from Phoebe

Monica: This is insane.
Phoebe: What's the big deal? You know, it's not like it's a real marriage.
Chandler: What?
Phoebe: Yeah, if you get married in Vegas, you're only married in Vegas.
Monica: What are you talking about? If you get married in Vegas, you're married everywhere.
Phoebe: Really?
Monica: Yeah.
Phoebe: Oh, my God! Oh, well.

Quote from Ross

Ross: I'm not kidding. Look, I can't have three failed marriages. I can't, okay? I am not gonna be that guy.
Rachel: So what, we just stay married forever?
Ross: Okay, how- How is this going to affect you, really? I mean, you fill some form out once in a while, instead of checking the box that says "Miss," you check the box that says, "Mrs." It's right next to it.
Rachel: Okay. I'm sorry, you're right. You know what? We can stay married because I thought that the boxes were far away from each other.

Quote from Ross

Ross: You wanna hear something weird?
Phoebe: Always.
Ross: I didn't get the annulment.
Phoebe: What?
Ross: We're still married. Don't tell Rachel. See you later.

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