Joey: All right, Rach, the big question is, does he like you? Because if he doesn't like you, this is all a moo point.
Rachel: Huh. A "moo" point?
Joey: Yeah. It's like a cow's opinion. It just doesn't matter. It's "moo."
Rachel: Have I been living with him for too long, or did that all just make sense?

Amy: Listen, not that you guys could stop me or anything because you know, you'd be dead. But I was thinking about changing her name. I'm just not really a big fan of Emily.
Ross: Emma.
Amy: Emma, Ross wants you.
Phoebe: Phoebe!
Amy: Why does she keep making that noise?

Monica: Anyway, it just doesn't seem worth it to make a whole turkey for just three people. Okay, it's a lot of work.
Joey: But you gotta have turkey on Thanksgiving. I mean, Thanksgiving with no turkey is like Fourth of July with no apple pie. Or Friday with no two pizzas.
Monica: Fine, if it means that much to you. But there's gonna be a ton left over.
Joey: No, there won't. I promise I will finish that turkey.
Monica: All right. You're telling me you can eat almost an entire turkey in one sitting?
Joey: That's right. Because I'm a Tribbiani. This is what we do. I mean, we may not be great thinkers or world leaders. We don't read a lot or run very fast. But damn it, we can eat!

Chandler: So Rachel's got 48 and Phoebe has the lead in vegetables. Joey?
Joey: Say hello to the new champ of Chandler's dumb states game.
Ross: Wow, how many you got?
Joey: 56.

Judy Geller: Monica, why don't you finish off these pies? I don't have any more room in the fridge.
Monica: No. No, thank you.
Jack Geller: Well, Judy, you did it. She's finally full.

Judy Geller: That's a lot of information to get in 30 seconds. All right. Joey, if you want to leave, just leave. Rachel, no, you weren't supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, I'm sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you're in an important relationship is beyond me.
Jack Geller: And we kind of figured about the porch swing.
Judy Geller: Ross. Drugs? Divorced again?

Rachel: Will, I just want to say, I'm real sorry for whatever I did to you in high school.
Will: Oh, it wasn't just me. We had a club.
Rachel: You had a club?
Will: That's right. The "I Hate Rachel Green Club".
Rachel: Oh, my God. So you all just joined together to hate me? Who else was in this club?
Will: Me and Ross.
Ross: No need to point. She knows who Ross is.

Joey: That's it? Even if nobody helps me, I can eat that, no problem. At least give me a challenge.
Monica: This is Chandler's chicken. This is the turkey.
Joey: Oh. How big is that?
Monica: About 19 pounds.
Joey: It's like me when I was born.

Rachel: God, she is unbelievable.
Ross: I know. I mean, a Ph.D. is just as good as an MD.
Rachel: Oh, sure, Ross, yeah. If I have a heart attack at a restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush.

Chandler: So, let me just get this straight. So my two friends die, I get Emma. Then my wife dies. Then Emma, the one tiny ray of hope left in my life gets taken away from me?
Phoebe: There's your movie.