TV Quotes

Joey: You want a good name, go with Joey. Joey's your pal, your buddy. Where is everybody? They're hanging out with Joey.
Chandler: You know what? If you're going to do that, if you're going to name him Joey, you should name him Chandler. Oh, come on, Chandler's funny, he's sophisticated, and he's very lovable once you get to know him.
Joey: Joey's lovable too. But the thing about Joey is, if you need him, he'll be there.
Chandler: Chandler will be there, too. I mean, he might be a little late but he'll be there. And he'll bring you some cold soda if what you need him for is that you're really hot.

Chandler: Hi. You're crazy. Okay, this is Emily. Emily is straight.
Ross: How do you know? I mean, we thought Carol was straight before I married her.
Phoebe: Yeah, definitely. I don't like the name Ross.
Ross: What a weird way to kick me when I'm down.
Phoebe: No, I meant for the baby.
Ross: Oh. What's wrong with Ross?
Phoebe: It's just that something like this would never happen to The Hulk, you know.
Ross: Actually, that's not true. In The Incredible Hulk, number 72, Dr. Bruce Banner found- You know. Never mind. My girlfriend's a lesbian.

Joey: Where is the waitress? I'm starving.
Chandler: It's a buffet, man.
Joey: Oh, here's where I win all my money back!

Chandler: How can I not be upset? I finally fall in love with this fantastic woman and it turns out she wanted you first.
Joey: Yeah, for like a half an hour one night. Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life. We look at you and we see you together, and it just it fits, you know? And you just know it's gonna last forever.
Chandler: That's what you should say.
Joey: What?
Chandler: When you're marrying us, that's what you should say.
Joey: Really? I could do it?
Chandler: I'd love you to do it.
Chandler: But those are the words. Those exact words.
Joey: Well, I don't remember exactly but it's pretty much about having and giving and sharing and receiving.