Phoebe Quote #186
Quote from Phoebe in The One with the List
Phoebe: Okay. This is a song about a love triangle between three people I made up. It's called "Two of Them Kissed Last Night."
[playing her guitar and singing] There was a girl, We'll call her Betty, And a guy, Let's call him Neil, Now I can't stress, This point too strongly, This story isn't real.
Now our Neil must decide, Who will be the girl that he casts aside, Will Betty be the one who he loves truly, Or will it be the one who we'll call Loolie.
He must decide, He must decide, Even though I made him up, He must decide.
Features in the collection: The Songs of Phoebe Buffay.
Friends Quotes
‘The Songs of Phoebe Buffay’
Quote from Phoebe in The One with Ross's Denial
Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] I found you in my bed, How'd you wind up there? You are a mystery, Little black curly hair, Little black curly hair, Little black, little black, little black, Little black curly hair.
Quote from Phoebe in The One with the Girl from Poughkeepsie
Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Went to the store, Sat on Santa's lap, Asked him to bring my friends, All kinds of crap, Said all you need is, To write them a song, Now you haven't heard it yet, So don't try to sing along, No, don't sing along, Monica, Monica Have a happy Hannukah, Saw Santa Claus, He said hello to Ross, And please tell Joey, Christmas will be snowy, And Rachel and Chandler, [indistinct] Happy holidays, everybody!
‘The One with the List’ Quotes
Quote from Monica
Monica: Mr. Rastatter, what does this job entail? The ad wasn't clear.
Mr. Rastatter: Mockolate.
Monica: I'm sorry?
Mr. Rastatter: Mockolate. It's a completely synthetic chocolate substitute.
Monica: Ooh.
Mr. Rastatter: Well, go ahead, try a piece. Yeah, we think Mockolate is even better than chocolate.
Monica: All right. Mmm.
Mr. Rastatter: Yeah?
Monica: I love how it crumbles. You see, chocolate doesn't do that?
Mr. Rastatter: No, ma'am. Well, anyhoo, we should be getting our FDA approval any day now. [fingers crossed] Hopefully, in time for Thanksgiving. See, the way we look at it, chocolate already dominates your major food-preparation holidays. Easter, Christmas, what have you. But, we're thinking, given the right marketing we can make Thanksgiving the Mockolate holiday.
Monica: Wow.
Mr. Rastatter: Aren't you gonna swallow that?
Monica: Just waiting for it to stop bubbling.
Mr. Rastatter: Yeah, isn't that great? Well, anyhoo, we're looking for a couple of chefs who can create Thanksgiving recipes. You think you might be interested?
Monica: Abso-[swallowing]-lutely! See, I love creating recipes, I love Thanksgiving, and now I love Mockolate.
Mr. Rastatter: Really?
Monica: Especially that aftertaste. I tell you that'll last you till Christmas.
Quote from Monica
Mr. Rastatter: Thanks for coming in again.
Monica: Not at all. I have no morals, and I need the cash.
Mr. Rastatter: It's like I'm looking in a mirror. Anyway, they're called Fish-tachios. They taste exactly like pistachios but they're made primarily of reconstituted fish bits. Here, try one. [opens a jar]
Monica: All right.
Mr. Rastatter:You're not allergic to anything?
Monica: Cat hair.
Mr. Rastatter: Oh, sorry. [closes the jar]
Quote from Monica
Monica: Now, in some of these recipes, the quantities may seem unusual. Like these coconut Mockolate holiday nut bars? I've indicated four cups of coconut and four cups of crushed nuts and only one tablespoon of Mockolate.
Mr. Rastatter: Doesn't matter.
Monica: What?
Mr. Rastatter: Our FDA approval didn't come through. Something about laboratory rats.
Monica: Gosh, I'm sorry.
Mr. Rastatter: Yeah. Hell, anyhoo, here's your check. Thank you for all the trouble you went through. Listen, you didn't eat a lot of it while you were cooking, did you?
Monica: Well, I ate some.
Mr. Rastatter: Oh, some. That's fine. Some is not a lot. So it doesn't burn when you pee, does it?