David: So I'm proposing to Phoebe tonight.
Chandler: Tonight? Isn't an engagement ring supposed to have a diamond? Oh, there it is.
David: Yes, well, being a failed scientist doesn't pay quite as well as you might think. That's one-seventieth of a carat. And the clarity is quite poor.

Phoebe: You can't stay here just for me.
David: Actually, I can. Because if I go, I have to break up with you. And I can't break up with you.
Phoebe: Yes, you can. Just say, "Phoebe, I love you, but my work is my life. That's what I have to do." And I say, "Your work? How can you say that?" Then you say, "It's tearing me apart but I have no choice.Can't you understand that? " And I say, "No! No! I can't understand that!"-
David: Ow.
Phoebe: Oh, sorry. And then you put your arms around me. Then you put your arms around me.
David: Oh, sorry.
Phoebe: And then you tell me that you love me and you'll never forget me.
David: I'll never forget you.
Phoebe: Then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go because you don't wanna start the year with me if you can't finish it. I'm gonna miss you, you scientist guy.

David: But you can't actually test this theory. Today's particle accelerators aren't powerful enough to simulate these conditions.
Phoebe: Okay, I have a question then.
David: Yeah?
Phoebe: Were you planning on kissing me ever?
David: That's definitely a valid question, and the answer would be yes. Yes, I was. But I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss at a phenomenal moment because it's you.
Phoebe: Sure.
David: Right. But, see, the longer I waited, the more phenomenal the kiss had to be. And now, it's just gotta be one of those things where l just, like, sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it. And I'm not really a sweeping sort of fella.
Phoebe: David, I think you are a sweeping sort of fella. I mean, you're a sweeper trapped inside a physicist's body.

David: Okay. You know what? This is really expensive. And this was a gift.
Phoebe: Now you're really just tidying up.

David: God, you look phenomenal.
Phoebe: Well. Yeah. You look great too. Did you get a haircut?
David: Yeah. Well, I got like 30 of them.

David: Anyway, do you want to have dinner tonight?
Phoebe: Yes. Oh, no!
David: What?
Phoebe: I can't. I can't believe I have plans. Can you do it tomorrow night?
David: No, I have to go in a few hours. I have to be on the red-eye. Well, listen, next time you're in Minsk...

David: I hate this, but I have to go. I can't miss my flight.
Phoebe: I bet there's another flight to Minsk-
David: in July.

Phoebe: That's really beautiful. What does it mean?
David: "Please clean my beakers." I don't get out of the lab much.

Phoebe: What are you doing here? Are you back from Minsk?
David: Well, just for a couple of days. I'm here to explain to the people who gave us our grant why it's a positive thing that we've spent all their money and accomplished nothing.

Phoebe: Remember when you asked me if I was seeing someone and I said no? Well, I am.
His name's Mike. I should've told you.
David: No. Well, yeah.
Phoebe: I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
David: Well, it's okay. I understand. Well, are you happy with this guy?
Phoebe: I am happy.
David: Damn it. I'm sorry. I don't mean that. I want you to be happy. But only with me. No, that's not fair. Who cares. Leave him. I don't mean that. Yes, I do. I'm sorry. Um, I think I should probably go.
Phoebe: But, David, I just want you to know that, you know telling you this is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
David: Well, just so you know hearing it wasn't exactly a Vladnik carnival, either.