Bebe: You know Doctor Clint Weber's medical show? Well, I see a daily segment called, "A Pregnant Pause: Roz Doyle's Term of Endearment." All of Seattle will share in the miracle happening inside you. Your joys, hopes, morning sickness, sonograms, even the birth.
Roz: I'll give birth on the air?
Bebe: It's radio. Just make the noises. Hell, I'll make them myself.
Waitress: Need anything else here?
Frasier: Just a shower, thank you.

Ben: Hey, talk about your small worlds. Turns out Mr. Twembly and I both sang tenor for the same choir back home in Salt Lake City. Nice meeting you ladies.
Bebe: [to Frasier] Well, when there's a dirty job to be done, you can't go wrong with a Mormon.

Bebe: So, Roz, I had a brainstorm last night about how to turn this little bundle of joy into a big bundle of cash!
Roz: I'm going to use my baby to make money?
Frasier: Yes, it's high time the little slacker started pulling his weight!

Bebe: Well, well. Look who's here. It's KACL's Frasier Crane.
Frasier: And Rosemary's Bebe.

Niles: Hello, Dad. I believe we switched videotapes on accident.
Martin: Believe me, I noticed.
Niles: Yes, there you go. At first I was dismayed. I popped in the tape, and there was Charles Bronson blowing away street trash, but I actually got into it. It was quite suspenseful.
Martin: Yeah, well, that's the way Duke and I felt about "My Dinner With Andre." Talk about suspense! Will they order dessert? Will they leave a good tip?

Frasier: Oh, hello, Niles.
Niles: Frasier, I'm sorry to trouble you about this, but could you recommend another couples' therapist?
Frasier: Good Lord, not again. What happened to Dr. Prescott?
Niles: Oh, please, Maris had me can Dr. Prescott weeks ago. Now she wants me to fire Dr. Wilfong.
Frasier: What's her problem with him?
Niles: She says his criticism of her is too harsh.
Frasier: Well, some therapists can be rather blunt and hard-hitting. What did he say?
Niles: He asked her to refrain from catalog shopping during our sessions.

Frasier: Hello, Ben.
Ben: Hi. Sorry I'm late. I was making my last Meals on Wheels delivery and I swerved to avoid a pigeon. You know, splat went the food all over the stuffed bears for the toy drive. I had to run home, throw the bears in the wash, and cook some more borscht for Mrs. Pavlov.
Frasier: I'm glad you made it. Anyway, this is my brother, Doctor Niles Crane.
Ben: Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you.
Niles: Hi. Sorry, I'm running out. You're certainly a refreshing change from Frasier's last agent. I think she would have swerved to hit the pigeon.
Frasier: Well, she would have swerved to hit Mrs. Pavlov.

Ben: This'll be great PR for both of you. They just bought a rare crane. I convinced them to name it after you - you know, Frasier "Crane." So, there'll be a ceremony with full newspaper and TV coverage.
Frasier: I think it's brilliant. I'm bolstering my bargaining position and also helping out a plucky little zoo. I love this man.
Daphne: I think it would be fun to have a crane named after me. I just love those big pouchy mouths they scoop up the fish in.
Ben: I think those are pelicans.
Daphne: Oh, right. Cranes are the ones who always sound like they're laughing. No, wait, I'm thinking of loons.
Martin: That's a coincidence.

Frasier: Now, now, now, Niles, withholding sex may be just as difficult on Maris. She may crumble first.
Niles: Are you serious? One hour of passion can sustain her for months. She stores it up like some sexual camel.

Niles: That's a striking arrangement.
Martin: It's from Bebe. After what happened today, she's trying to woo him back.
Niles: Birds of Paradise, I suppose that's her idea of floral irony.