‘The Life of the Party’
Season 5, Episode 22 - Aired May 12, 1998
Despairing at their love lives, Martin encourages Frasier and Niles to throw a singles party.
Quote from Niles
Vicky: Do you live with your father, Niles?
Niles: [laughing] Oh, no. A grown man, live with his father? Frasier lives with Dad. Champagne?
Quote from Niles
Roz: Frasier.
Frasier: Not now, Roz.
Roz: Come here.
Frasier: Can't you see I'm busy?
Roz: My water just broke!
Frasier: Well, maybe you sat in something.
Niles: Oh, my God, what's all over my Turkish prayer rug?
Quote from Frasier
Martin: She's pretty. I should make a play for her, considering how young and attractive I am tonight!
Frasier: I said I was sorry! Not half as sorry as I was when I went over that speed bump and you left a head print on the ceiling of my BMW.
Quote from Niles
Martin: It's been a hell of a night for all of us.
Niles: Well, it certainly was for me. I lost Vickie, my rug is ruined, someone left weird brown stains on my wing
chair.
Quote from Frasier
Martin: Don't you start on me, mister, you left me melting by that fire.
Niles: Wait a minute! You're the one who left stains on my wing chair!
Frasier: I was wondering when you'd crack that, Miss Marple.
Quote from Daphne
Daphne: Stop it! What is wrong with the three of you? Our friend is having a baby in there.
Niles: I'm sorry, Daphne, we've all had dreadful evenings, but you're absolutely right. We should be thinking of Roz.
Daphne: Exactly. Besides, nobody could've had as horrendous an evening as I did. I got stood up. At a bat mitzvah. I waited there an hour. Oh, he left some lame excuse on the machine, but if he thinks he's got another chance with me, he's meshugga.
Quote from Martin
Frasier: Oh, boo-hoo, anyway. At least you had a date tonight.
Niles: Oh, at least your apartment wasn't decimated.
Martin: I went to a party tonight with shoe polish on my hair.
Quote from Daphne
Frasier: Roz. Congratulations.
Martin: Oh, look at her.
Niles: Oh, she's beautiful.
Daphne: Mazel tov.
[Roz gives Frasier a perplexed look]
Frasier: It's a long story.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: Anyway, as I was saying, where does one go to meet available women?
Niles: There are singles bars, of course. Uh, we could join a health club.
Frasier: Oh, there's a splendid idea. Yes, I can just picture the two of us: tank tops and spandex. Find us a pair of matching headbands, we might as well just sterilize ourselves.
Quote from Martin
Martin: Oh, ever since I turned sixty-five, all I get is geezer mail. It's very depressing.
Daphne: If you ask me, the only thing depressing about being a geezer is looking like one. There's lots of things a person can do to make himself look younger. How he dresses-
Martin: Nah, I tried those Jordache jeans. I just think you ought to leave something to the imagination.