‘The Good Son’
Season 1, Episode 1 - Aired September 16, 1993
Just as Frasier is finally getting settled in his new apartment and new job in his hometown of Seattle, his life is thrown upside down when he must take care of his ailing father.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: Roz, I think we have time for one more.
Roz: Yes, Dr. Crane. On line four, we have Russell from Kirkland.
Frasier: Hello, Russell, this is Dr. Frasier Crane. I'm listening.
Russell: Well, I've been feeling sort of, you know, depressed lately. My life's not going anywhere. It's not that bad. It's just, same old apartment, same old job. Sometimes-
Frasier: Uh, Russell, we're just about at the end of our hour. Let me see if I can cut to the chase by using myself as an example. Six months ago, I was living in Boston. My wife had left me, which was very painful. Then she came back to me, which was excruciating. On top of that, my practice had grown stagnant and my social life consisted of, well, hanging around a bar night after night. You see, I was clinging to a life that wasn't working any more. And I knew I had to do something, anything. So I ended the marriage once and for all and moved back here to my hometown of Seattle. Go, Seahawks! I took action, Russell, and you can too. Move, change, do something. If it's a mistake, do something else.
Quote from Roz
Frasier: Well, the rest of the show was pretty good. It was a good show, wasn't it?
Roz: Here. Your brother called.
Frasier: Roz, in the trade, we call that "avoidance". Don't change the subject. Tell me what you think.
Roz: Did I ever tell you what this button does?
Frasier: I am not a piece of Lalique. I can handle criticism. How was I today?
Roz: Let's see. You dropped two commercials. You left a total of 28 seconds of dead air. You scrambled the call letters. You spilt yogurt on the control board, and you kept referring to Jerry, with the identity crisis, as "Jeff".
Frasier: You say my brother called?
Quote from Niles
Niles: Tell me, you would have handled it differently, Frasier? Would you have handled it differently?
Frasier: Oh, I'm sorry, Niles. I didn't realize you had stopped talking.
Niles: You haven't heard a word I said.
Frasier: Oh, Niles, you're a psychiatrist. You know what it's like to listen to people prattling on endlessly about their mundane lives.
Niles: Touché. And on that subject, I heard your show today.
Frasier: And?
Niles: You know what I think of pop psychiatry.
Frasier: Yes, I know what you think about everything. When was the last time you had an unexpressed thought?
Niles: I'm having one now.
Quote from Niles
Niles: Well, then, we're agreed about what to do with Dad. "Golden Acres. We care so you don't have to."
Frasier: It says that?
Niles: Well, it might as well.
Frasier: All right, I'll make up the spare bedroom.
Niles: You're a good son, Frasier.
Frasier: Oh, God, I am, aren't I?
Waitress: Two cafe supremos. Anything to eat?
Frasier: No, I seem to have lost my appetite.
Niles: I'll have a large piece of cheesecake.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: So, what do you think of what I've done with the place, huh? You know, every item here was carefully selected. This lamp by Corbu. The chair by Eames. And this couch is an exact replica of the one Coco Chanel had in her Paris atelier.
Martin: Nothing matches.
Frasier: It's a style of decorating. It's called eclectic. Well, the theory behind it is if you've got really fine pieces of furniture, it doesn't matter if they match. They will go together.
Martin: It's your money.
Quote from Niles
Frasier: Niles, you don't still have the brochures from those those rest homes, do you?
Niles: Of course I do. Don't forget, Maris is five years older than I am.
Quote from Niles
Niles: You really think that's necessary?
Frasier: I'm afraid I do. I don't have my life any more. Tuesday night I gave up my tickets to the theatre. Wednesday, it was to the symphony.
Niles: That reminds me. Weren't you going to the opera on Friday?
Frasier: Yes. Here.
Niles: Thank you.
Quote from Frasier
Martin: You'll adjust.
Frasier: I don't want to adjust. I've done enough adjusting. I'm in a new city, I've got a new job. I'm separated from my little boy, which in itself is enough to drive me nuts. And now my father and his dog are living with me. Well, that's enough on my plate, thank you. The whole idea of getting somebody in here was to help ease my burden, not to add to it.
Martin: Oh, you hear that, Eddie? We're a burden.
Frasier: Oh, Dad. Dad, you're twisting my words. I meant burden in its most positive sense.
Martin: As in "Gee, what a lovely burden"?
Frasier: Something like that, yes.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: [rushing into the booth] They have got to move the bathroom closer to the studio! We'll be back after these messages. [to Roz] Can't I put that on tape?
Quote from Daphne
Martin: You wanted me to pick one.
Frasier: But she's a kook. I don't like her.
Martin: Well, what difference does it make to you? She's only going to be here when you're not.
Frasier: Then what's my problem? Daphne! You've been retained.
Daphne: Oh, wonderful! I had a premonition.
Frasier: Quelle surprise.
Daphne: I'll move me things in tomorrow.
Frasier: Oh, move in? Oh, I'm sorry, there must be some misunderstanding. This isn't a live-in position.
Daphne: Oh, dear. Well, the lady at the agency-
Frasier: The lady at the agency was wrong. This is a part-time position. I'm afraid it just won't work out.
Martin: Hold on there, Frasier. Let's talk about this.
Frasier: Dad, there's nothing to discuss.
Daphne: You two should talk about this, so I'll just pop back in here and enjoy some more of your African erotic art.