Frasier: This is outrageous! I can't believe you're cutting me out like this.
Niles: I'm sorry. I try to be an ethical person, but wine is my weakness, and... this is really too good to share.
Frasier: I see.
Niles: I will find a way to make it up to you.
Frasier: Why don't you just sell me my half?
Niles: I said I'll find a way to make it up to you. You have my word.
Frasier: Really? Your oral agreements aren't worth the air into which they are uttered.

Niles: I don't know. My books are the one thing I'm fussy about.

Daphne: Why don't we just watch a nice soothing movie?
Martin: Like what?
Daphne: How about "Message in a Bottle"?
Martin: Oh, is that one of those movies that takes 45 minutes for anything to happen, and then you're sorry it did?

Frasier: DVD player?
Niles: Okay, you caught me in a selfish moment. I was trying to assuage my guilt for the way I treated him.
Frasier: And you weren't trying to buy Kirby's loyalty so that you and you alone could benefit from your Mulvehill connection, reviving your woefully flagging reputation in the wine community?
Niles: I categorically deny that!
Frasier: So you did it just to burn me?
Niles: I deny that.
Frasier: But not categorically.

Kirby: You just got yourself a wine tour.
Frasier: Well... and thank you Kirby.
Kirby: This is so awesome, and I promise, I will not let you down. I'm going to soak up as much as I can from you. I'm going to be like your shadow. You and me, Dr. Crane, from now on. You know, we should probably carpool to work.
Frasier: Niles, could I see you for a moment?
Niles: No.

Daphne: Who was that?
Martin: Dr. Stewart.
Daphne: Are you all right?
Martin: I'm fine.
Daphne: I suppose you want me to put the game on, then.
Martin: Well, uh, actually, he said there was a bit of a foul-up with the computer and, uh, maybe I should wear it for a couple more hours.
Daphne: Well, that's too bad. Do you want me to rewind?
Martin: If you're going to keep talking.

Frasier: I am terribly sorry.
Kirby: It's not your fault. You did everything you could, right?
Frasier: Well- Yes- You know, I'll tell you what. Um, I will keep my ears open for-for any opportunities, all right?
Kirby: That would be great, Dr. Crane. Something in law enforcement would be awesome.
Frasier: Yes, well... that shouldn't be too difficult, considering you were trained... by the F.B.O.

Frasier: So, what brings you here, Kirby?
Kirby: I heard your radio station's looking for an intern.
Frasier: Radio station's looking for an intern you say?
Kirby: I was hoping you could hook me up. Just think, Roz, with me working here, we'll be together like, 24/7 five days a week.
Roz: ... Okay.

Kirby: I was hoping you could go over my resumé.
Frasier: Oh, well, uh, all right, Kirby. Uh... although I must tell you that the station manager has final say in these matters.
Kirby: I fudged a little bit on my job history.
Frasier: So you never actually worked at NASA?
Kirby: Or Burger King.

Kenny: Oh, hey, Doc. Oh, is this one of the intern candidates?
Frasier: Uh, well...
Kenny: Kenny Daly. I'm the station manager.
Kirby: Pleased to meet you. I'm so stoked to get this job.
Kenny: I like that in a candidate, Doc. He looks hungry.
Kirby: That's amazing, dude, because I am kind of hungry.
Kenny: There's a vending machine right out there. Hey, I love this guy. He's a breath of fresh air. Unlike all these Ivy League snobs you've been prancing around all day.