Niles Quote #1426
Quote from Niles in The Fight Before Christmas
Martin: Well, I feel bad about Yoshi, but are you sure it's a good idea spending the evening with Maris?
Niles: Well, she's terribly upset. Maris and Yoshi were very close. In fact, I remember he once made a topiary likeness of her and wept without shame when it developed root rot.
Features in the collection: The Maris Crane Files.
Frasier Quotes
‘The Maris Crane Files’
Quote from Frasier in The Good Son
Niles: Of course, I can't take care of him.
Frasier: Oh, yes, of course. Of course. Why?
Niles: Because Dad doesn't get along with Maris.
Frasier: Who does?
Niles: I thought you liked my Maris.
Frasier: I do. I like her from a distance. You know, the way you like the sun. Maris is like the sun, except without the warmth.
Quote from Niles in The Seal Who Came to Dinner
Niles: Let's get some lights on. [claps]
Frasier: Good Lord, what the hell is that?
Niles: Maris had it made after she lost power in a storm. Battery operated, works on a clapper so you can find it in the dark. Only problem was, the poor thing, try as she might, could never clap hard enough to activate it.
‘The Fight Before Christmas’ Quotes
Quote from Niles
Mel: You were with Maris last night?
Niles: Well.
Mel: How dare you?
Niles: Anything else in the box, Pandora?
Quote from Niles
Niles: Unfortunately, I have to see Maris tonight.
Martin: Maris? What the hell do you have to see her for?
Niles: Sadly, to pay my condolences. It seems our old gardener has passed away unexpectedly.
Frasier: Oh, not Yoshi. Gosh, that's too bad.
Niles: He had a heart attack when he was out trimming Maris's elaborate hedge maze. The paramedics never had a chance.
Quote from Frasier
Mel: Hello.
Frasier: Well, gosh, I never expected to see you here.
Mel: Oh, well, I was one of the doctors on "Health Chat" during cosmetic surgery week. I did a segment on breast augmentation.
Frasier: Oh, how uplifting. [Frasier laughs, Mel doesn't]