Sam: It's all right. I've been called back to work. It would be a shame to let a good meal go to waste.
Niles: [sniffs] Ah, Frasier's morel mushroom and tarragon sauce.
Sam: Wow. How did you know that?
Frasier: Niles has always been able to identify a sauce from a great distance.
Martin: His mother and I were so proud.

Frasier: Hello. I'd like to return this purse.
Sales Associate: I'm terribly sorry, but this was a sale item and we have a no-return policy. You wife didn't like it?
Frasier: Well, I'm not married at the moment.
Sales Associate: Girlfriend?
Frasier: No, no, no, no girlfriend either. In fact I don't have time to go into all my other non-existent relationships. It was a gift for a friend.
Sales Associate: Ah, well. Perhaps your friend would like to make it work with some matching shoes. We have up to size thirteen.
Frasier: This really was a gift and I would thank you when you say the word "friend" not to italicize it.

Daphne: What a shame, and after you cooked that lovely meal.
Frasier: Yes, and let me tell you something, crown roast does not prepare itself. You know, it's funny, as much as I care for this woman, there's something about this relationship that leaves me vaguely unsettled.
Niles: I might venture a theory at which you're sure to hoot. What may be making you uncomfortable is that for the first time you find yourself in a more submissive role.
Frasier: Oh, what on God's earth are you talking about?
Daphne: I think what he means is, you're the girl!