Niles Quote #327
Quote from Niles in Daphne's Room
Martin: I still think you're making too big a deal out of this.
Niles: Dad, I have never seen Maris this angry. I swear, her eye was twitching like a frog in a science experiment.
Martin: Well, when your mother got mad at me, I'd just grab her, bend her backwards, and give her a kiss which made her glad she was a woman.
Niles: I can't do that with Maris. She has abnormally rigid vertebrae, she'd snap like a twig.
Features in the collection: The Maris Crane Files.
Frasier Quotes
‘The Maris Crane Files’
Quote from Frasier in The Good Son
Niles: Of course, I can't take care of him.
Frasier: Oh, yes, of course. Of course. Why?
Niles: Because Dad doesn't get along with Maris.
Frasier: Who does?
Niles: I thought you liked my Maris.
Frasier: I do. I like her from a distance. You know, the way you like the sun. Maris is like the sun, except without the warmth.
Quote from Niles in The Seal Who Came to Dinner
Niles: Let's get some lights on. [claps]
Frasier: Good Lord, what the hell is that?
Niles: Maris had it made after she lost power in a storm. Battery operated, works on a clapper so you can find it in the dark. Only problem was, the poor thing, try as she might, could never clap hard enough to activate it.
‘Daphne's Room’ Quotes
Quote from Niles
Martin: Oh, why don't you just get her a nice bottle of perfume?
Niles: She gets hives.
Martin: How about candy?
Niles: Hypoglycemic.
Martin: Just get her a dozen roses.
Niles: Allergic.
Quote from Niles
Niles: Dad, as usual, your simple homespun wisdom has pricked the balloon of Frasier's pomposity.
Quote from Niles
Martin: What happened to that Louis the French guy birthday party?
Niles: Disaster there too! Maris reminded me that an entire branch of her family tree were slaughtered by the Huguenots.