Niles: This has been kind of fun, but I really have to go. I'm conducting a seminar on multiple personality disorders and it takes me forever to fill out the name tags.

Frasier: Bad news?
Miller: Oh, you could say that. I've just been fired. They decided the best way to cut the budget was to get rid of my high salary.
Frasier: Oh, Ned, - I'm so sorry. Then I guess this means that my job is still safe, then?
Miller: Yeah. I guess so.
Frasier: Well, you know, Ned, I haven't been in the radio game that long. But, uh, I've been around long enough to know that people get fired. And when they do, they always seem to land on their feet. Now, I've known quite a few people and counseled them that have suffered similar setbacks. But, uh, in time you will embrace this. Learn to think of this as, oh, a new chapter. You know, in theatrical circles, they always say "Every exit is but an entrance to somewhere else."
Miller: ... God, I wish I'd fired you when I had the chance!

Roz: Dr. Crane, we have Don on his car phone. He's having a problem with his weight.
Frasier: Don, it's a common problem. I'm listening.
Don: "Ah, it's the screwiest thing, Doc. I eat healthy, I work out, but no matter what I do, I can't lose a pound. It's very depressing."
Frasier: Yes, well, losing weight can be a life-long struggle. It takes a commitment. Now, if you're ready to accept that, there are a number of things I could suggest.
Fast Food Server: "May I take your order, please?"
Frasier: Don, what was that?
Don: "Huh? Oh, nothing. It was the radio. Go ahead, you were talking."
Frasier: Don, where are you?
Don: "I'm just driving around."
Fast Food Server: "Please speak into the clown's mouth."
Frasier: Don.
Don: "Sorry, Dr. Crane. I'm going to lose you. I'm going into a tunnel! Goodbye!"
Frasier: Yes, and the light at the end of that tunnel is a heat lamp over a large order of fries.